Black women

Black History Month

I am so thankful for black history month. Every year  I share black history facts and always end up finding out new things. There is so much that we wasn’t taught in school.

Does anyone know anything about what happened on March 2, 1955? Nine months before Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat to a white man someone else did her name was Claudette Colvin. I know right in school we were always taught about Rosa Parks. When  I think about all the history that wasn’t taught in school it really gets me to thinking.

Claudette Colvin was a 15 year old high school student who refused to give her bus seat up to a white person. There was quite a few black women who refused to give up their seat but they were fined instead of jailed. On March 2, 1955 a bus driver ordered Colvin to get out of her seat she refused and was arrested by two police officers.

Most people including myself don’t know the role that Colvin played in the bus boycotts. Colvin was one of four women who challenged the law. Colvin case overturned the bus segregation laws in Montgomery and Alabama.

Colvin was asked why was her story not talked about she felt it was because her community shunned her after her arrest and once she became pregnant. Colvin felt that the civil rights leader felt that she was an inappropriate symbol for the test case. Colvin spoke of the colorism within the black race how Rosa Parks had “the look” her skin texture and good hair was the kind that people associated with middle class. Rosa Parks was a married woman and Colvin was a pregnant teen. Colvin felt that Rosa Parks was used because civil rights leaders felt that she would be a better icon.

When I found out about Claudette Colvin story I wasn’t sure who I should be more upset with. Yes there was segregation but what about the way that Colvin was treated by her own people? What about the things she endured because she was a pregnant teen? Who’s responsible for the colorism that took place? Who is responsible for not allowing Colvin story to make it in to the history books?

I so enjoy black history month and  I do not have anything against Martin Luther King Jr or Rosa Parks  I just think we need to be taught about history in it’s entirety. There was a lot of women and teens who were making a stand in the segregation situations not just middle aged men in suits.

colvin200-48ca886d51d65f2111116d8cb84cdf89925538d3-s700-c85

Being A Great Dad

Growing up in a broken home

Taught me that parenting

Should not be done alone

Indeed we have our heavenly Father

He also gives us rules to follow

That we all should honor

A mother is to nurture her children

Instill compassion in her children

Teach them brilliant cooking skills

A mother plants amazing feelings

Into her children so that they take root

A father gives his children advice

Teaches his children how to ride a bike

Teaches his children how to drive

How a man treats a lady

He leads by example

He’s his children protector whether

Or not he and the mother are together

A mother’s and a father’s love for

Their children should always be equal

Too many are trying to minimize

A father’s unique contributions

As if it means nothing at all

These kinds of attitudes are part

Of the black community’s problem

I know men who are good fathers

Who have had the worse life experiences

I’m talking horrendous

Yet they don’t use them as crutches

Are there petty mothers

Who for no good reasons stops

The children’s fathers from having

A relationship with their kids

Yes and those situations I don’t accept

But let’s be honest those kinds of

Situations are rare

How about the fathers who makes

The choice to neglect

Having a relationship with their children

Those kind of fathers

Don’t deserve any respect

Once  a person becomes a parent

A mission must be made to make sure

That their children have

The absolute best

A parent’s love should always be felt

Even when they aren’t present

Children should never ever feel

As if they never received enough love

There’s nothing that hurts worse

Then to feel rejected by

Your very own parent

Why should a child have to learn

How to become immune to hurt

It’s the same old tune

We are living in a society

With people who are self absorbed

Classic narcissistic behavior

Some of these fathers who aren’t good

Align themselves with

A bunch of yes men

Ones who agree with everything

Whether they are right or wrong

Bobble heads who are afraid

To stand up or challenge

Newsflash they are not true friends

Sick of some of these dead beat

Fathers crying about children support

When you didn’t do right on your own

So mothers had to turn

To the government for assistance

It’s your fault that you fathers

Have to pay it

Some of your fathers words

Ain’t worth nothing

Never consistent

No wonder why you have bad credit

Constantly trying to make

A mother feel bad for asking for help

Dude we didn’t make these

Children by ourselves

If you can’t be a good father

Do us all a favor

And get yourself fixed

So over these good for nothing fathers

Who’s always coming up with excuses

Like a student sitting in

The principal’s office

Offering a reason for skipping

How about this don’t just be a father

Be a dad

That’s called being a man

A sign of great parenting

Is not having children

Who becomes estranged from you

The moment they reach 18

All behind past things that happened

In which they are still hurting

Having a blessed relationship

With our children until we are old

Should be every parent’s

Ultimate goal

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Are Beautiful

Recently everywhere I turn

I see men of different races

Including my very own

Making it seem like

Black women are the least desirable

Men like Chris Rock and

Steve Harvey speaking about

The kinds of men who love us

I can’t take it anymore

Our black is beautiful

Every day many of us struggle

With situations that

We should not have to endure alone

We are mothers

Who are also filling in as

The role of father

This situation has gotten old

The worse part is when we

Are made to feel like

We are somehow responsible

For receiving the hurt

That we don’t deserve

It’s so absurd

One of the stupidest things

That  I have ever heard

There’s a 72% percentage

Of absentee fathers

Look at the numbers

These men choose

To not be bothered

It doesn’t take a math whiz

Or a rocket scientist

Last time  I checked

It takes a man and a woman

To make a baby

Is there any other ways

I’ll wait

Lord knows that  I am a Christian

I always turn the other cheek constantly

Most black women are forgiving

About the situations that helps

Many of us to feel incomplete

Dealing with things like certain men

Who are filled with deceit that cheat

Lacking the understanding as to

Why some men would rather mistreat

Good women in a heartbeat

As if it would kill them to

Commit faithfully

In spite of black women circumstances

Defeat is not a part of our vocabulary

We always push ourselves hard

Like a star athlete

There’s a lot more to us

Than what people think

I’m telling  you right now

On us don’t sleep

We are constantly striving and evolving

Every word that  I speak

Is concrete

I can produce receipts

Say what  you want about me

Turn up the heat

I will not surrender or retreat

Can’t continue to listen

To all of the bull

Like how some of the wounds

Of black women

Are self-inflicted

I just don’t understand it

I do know that black women

Are over being taken for granted

As well as being blamed for this

Got me like

Alanis Morrissette

Isn’t it ironic

Don’t you think

Some black men

Speak of wanting black women

To hold them down

When they have nothing

Yet when some of them get on

Their feet

They treat their women and

Very own children

Like pot holes in a street

Then have the nerve

To question why we are angry

Really?

Please

Spare me

After awhile all of this becomes

So annoying

Some of you have no concept

Of loyalty

As long as black women

Are going along with the program

Everything is hunky-dory

However once we wake up

And stand up things are

A different story

Oh and don’t get me

Talking about the subject of dating

Black men was the first to

Put cream in their coffee

This is after slavery

At least that’s what mother

Used to tell me

May her beautiful soul

Rest in peace

If black women

Date outside of their race

Immediately we are accused

Of self-hate

In addition making it seem

As if men of other races

See us as mere fetishes

Like we are nothing

More than sex objects

I’m so sick of the disrespect

When will you guys open your eyes

And realize that

When our community is hurting

No one benefits

And no wins

Because we all suffer in the end

Things comes back in a full spin

I won’t stop talking about this

It’s a promise

Like Mc Hammer

I’m too legit to quit

Refusing to conform

To what seems to be the norm

Because it’s awful

Black women we deserve love

Beyond measure

We are a treasure

Keep in mind that love has no color

This mindset opens up our options more

Always remember this number

One thing and that is our value

Is not found in negative

People’s words

Black women are powerful

Even when we stand alone

We are so strong

Black women we are beautiful

Culture Awareness

Recently I finished a course in Intercultural Competence and it taught me a lot of new things when it comes to interacting with different cultures. In order to become aware of other cultures it helps to become aware of your own. I have learned that once we understand others cultures; we can then appreciate them, establish a relationship and build an alliance. To build a strong community it takes a large number of people to make it work. Each culture is unique and has perspectives and strengths that any community can benefit from. Having an understanding of every culture can help us to overcome as well as avoid ethnic and racial divisions. A community can win when people don’t struggle with the vision of what a fair, moral and harmonious society is. There are many cultures and of course many of us would like to know about them all a good way to start is finding out about who lives in our community, the kind of diversity that already exists, the struggles that exist between the cultures, the struggles that are openly recognized and the kinds of issues that the different cultures have in common.

When it comes to having a community that is united there certain steps that should be taken and there are things that should not be done as well. Let’s use the African-American culture as an example there has been a lot of bad things that have taken place. There is still a lot of hurt that has turned into anger which is present in America to this very day. Even though I am an African-American one thing is true making people feel guilty for what their ancestors have done hundreds of years ago will not help diversity to become effective. People tend to change when they don’t feel condemned or guilt tripped. One day I saw a post from a Facebook friend she actually apologized for what her ancestors had done hundreds of years ago and I commented telling her that it was unnecessary. It may come as a shock to many but I get called names a lot like sellout and even accused of not being true to my culture. I have gotten slammed on several occasions all because of my views. My Christian beliefs help to keep me hopeful no matter how a situation looks like. In my opinion when it comes to bring cultures together everyone must be included, a solution of what can be done to solve the issues with hope of getting it done together is a huge step into the right direction. Having a strong community can only happen by  people working together from every culture this will help to build a strong relationship that has a core.

As I have written in the beginning getting to know one’s own culture and other cultures builds bridges that can connect people in addition recognizing the differences is important too. Many times people don’t want to recognize cultures differences out of fear that it may cause division however it’s actually on the contrary. Learning about other cultures can actually bring people closer together. When people are aware of other cultures they learn how to interact without negativity happening. A mind closed mind is not open to knowledge and so ignorance grows. It’s important that we all keep in mind that regardless of our cultures being different we all have feelings,we are human beings and we are all God’s Children.

Galatians 3:26

For ye are all the children of God by faith in Christ Jesus.

It’s Up To Us

I’m not pointing fingers

But we must admit

That the black community is damaged

No one wants to talk about it

No one wants to face

What is happening

No one wants to get serious

About their life choices

The ones that actually has

Major consequences

That unfortunately once done

We can’t change or fix

People want to program their minds

To see their lives

As a happily ever after

A fairy tale

But no one wants to discuss

How certain choices can bring

Us back to reality have us

Sounding like a nursery rhyme

Old woman in the shoe

Had so many children

That she didn’t know what to do

Messing with the wrong men

Will have your life like a soap opera

All my children

And you are Not Erica

Having multiple babies out of wedlock

Losing value on the dating market

As if the arrow is pointing downward

On Down Jones

Ladies don’t waste unnecessary time

Ask the man who you feel

Maybe your potential mate

What are his goals and dreams

If he wants to get married

He will tell you

Don’t let having multiple children

And him not marrying  you

To be a life lesson

It won’t be only you who will suffer

The children will too

Don’t be a fool

Don’t continue to hold on

Respect his decision

Move on life is short

Even though every single black mother’s

Situations are unique

Even though all single black mothers

Are not irresponsible

It doesn’t matter to

The people of the world

It’s time to wake up

Poverty, despair, and hopelessness

Are parts of nightmares

And should not be identified as

Being apart of African American culture

We have got to do better

We have to not feed into the negative

Stereotypes and generalizations

That some of us choose to embrace

It’s a big mistake

It’s up to us what we choose

What we answer to or who we allow

Ourselves to get attached to

Allowing negativity to turn inward

Single black mothers are not used goods

Not all of us are from the hood

Not all of us are ghetto

Those are words of the devil

We know that he is the biggest liar

Of them all

One of the greatest titles

That a woman can possess

Is being called mother

The greatest words that a parent

Can hear is their children

Tell them that they love you

We want our children to have

A better life than what we had

That requires having a stable home

Which consist of a mom and a dad

A happy homes goes beyond a fad

It never goes out of style

We don’t want to be responsible

For our children walking around

With a hole in their hearts

Remember they are suppose

To experience love first

From ma and pops

It’s time to break the curse

It’s time to stop making excuses

Because they are useless

The Black community

Needs to get it together

The broken home situation

Is very urgent

I’m Not Surprised

Recently a former pastor has been making the news by the name of Kevin Wesley. Kevin Wesley is a black man who says that he cannot lie to black people anymore about Christianity. One thing that disturbs me about nonbelievers is why can’t they not believe in Christ allllll by themselves why must they make it their mission to poison other people with their toxic views? Nonbelievers always complain about Christian people “cramming” our beliefs down their throats but aren’t they doing the same thing that they complain about? Most Christians spread the Word of God out of love we have no intentions of hurting anyone. The things that most Christians  do is done out of love.

The former pastor Kevin Wesley has me very skeptical about his intentions there are far from pure. Wesley made a point to say that he cannot lie to black people anymore which is trying to cause some division within the body of Christ. I understand why some black people have a problem with Christianity the Bible describes Christ as one way but we have seen pictures of something different. Let’s think Christ was around long before slavery did white people years ago abuse the Bible? Yes they did. Still we must take our eyes off of man and focus on God. Even the slaves had faith in Christ some of our best hymns came from them. There are many taking positions in the church and they weren’t called to do it in the first place 1 Timothy 1:11-12. Yeah  I said it! We can’t have weak people leading the church with their bad intentions. If  you wasn’t call sit down and stop causing people to fall. I refuse to allow a person who wasn’t called by God send me to hell. We must stay awake!!! No sleeping. Times are getting far too dangerous.

Everyday God shows us His work from the time when we wake up until the time we go to sleep. He demonstrates how faith is the thing that we need the most to survive think about it the one thing we need the most to live is the one thing that we cannot see and it’s all around us…air. In life there will be ups and downs just because you are a Christian doesn’t mean we won’t have to endure hardship. We can’t have a rainbow without the rain or a baby without labor pains. I don’t hate nonbelievers I pray for them because whatever is hurting them is cause them to hurt others.

Here’s my take Christians should cut off anyone who doesn’t respect our beliefs and pray for them. Our Christian beliefs is what keeps us strong in a very cruel world. I am not surprised at all about people falling away from the church Christ warned us of this.

Matthew 24:10-13

10 And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.

11 And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.

12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.

13 But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.

Spiritual Maturity

I will not and do not pretend that  I have it all together; however, I will say that I am a woman who has learned from her mistakes. One of the biggest mistakes that  I have done in the past is allowing my emotions to control me. Too many times we live off of our feelings when we live from off of our feelings, we don’t make wise choices. Spiritual maturity is knowing how to manage our emotions and not allowing them to control us. It’s good to have feelings they help us to be able to relate to others we can empathize and have compassion, but we can’t allow our feelings to lead us the wrong way. There can be no spiritual growth as long as we follow our feelings; we have to know what feels wrong but choose to do what is right.

The enemy mission is to kill, steal, and destroy the one thing he wants the most is to kill our faith; he tries to do this during times of trouble. How we respond to the enemy attacks is to not act like him but act like Christ. I speak about marriage a whole lot; it’s a covenant that was created by God; marriage is one of the best examples of commitment. Marriage is a beautiful thing, especially when it has God as the foundation. So many marriages end in divorce because people go into it with unrealistic ideas of what marriage is. A word of advice if you are standing in front of the pastor exchanging vows with the thought of if this doesn’t work then. Do Not Get Married!!! Divorce should not be an option if a marriage encounters problems. Unions have problems sometimes  I don’t care how great it is at times. The vows have for better or worse, let’s focused on both words because they are both critical. When people first get married, everything is new, but after a while, it will wear off commitment is suppose to step in, it takes a marriage to a deeper level which is more substantial.

I want a husband that is committed to me once the excitement and newness wear off. I want a husband who loves Christ more than I do, is loyal, faithful, sincere, a leader, and is more stringent than the toughest times that we encounter. Commitment is strength and not giving up just because things don’t feel right anymore. An excellent marriage strength is in its commitment and not just feelings alone; it’s a sign of real victory!! Remember a marriage will lose its newness like a brand new car but you will still keep the car, right? Total commitment is staying committed to the very end.

I’ve come along way, and  I have been through a lot, but I thank God for all of it. Every day I commit to putting on love, kindness, and patience regardless of the situation or how I feel. People have disappointed me, betrayed me, let me down, and hurt me even after  I have been helpful to them. I feel sorry for people who are always angry; it’s a sign that they are operating off of emotions alone, and that is never good. Regardless of how people treat me, I am still going to do things on purpose like loving those who have hurt me and pray for them. Hurt people hurt others healed people heal others; I am whole!! I am always counting the cost of every move that  I make, and I am walking in love too. Thankful so much for becoming strong spiritually off of the Word of God.

Colossians 3:14

And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.

New Lifestyle

As I have shared I took a nutritional class and I have decided to become Vegan. I have been a Vegan for about 21 days. It is said that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit so I feel comfortable discussing about being Vegan.

Vegan and Vegetarian are Not the same vegan is a plant based diet. A vegan does not eat animals or things that comes from animals such as milk, cheese or eggs. Some vegetarians eat fish, chicken, eggs and cheese occasionally.  Vegan is all or nothing so I am riding with that. I’m pretty proud of myself I have so much energy meat can make a person feel weighed down. The holidays are quickly approaching so now is the best time it’s as good of time as any. There are so many delicious vegan recipes I can’t wait to try them all.

To be honest I haven’t been a huge meat eater so that help me out a lot. Since I just recently took on this lifestyle I’m not pushing it on my sons. Even though my sons are not huge meat eater they enjoy meat when they eat it thus I will not force them to become Vegan. There are various people who I follow on YouTube who are Vegan and some are black. Yes there are black people who enjoy the Vegan lifestyle myself included. January is try Vegan month give it a try and see what happens. I love it!! I am Vegan!! Yes!

 

Happy Loving Day

On June 12, 1967 it became legal in the state of Virginia for interracial couples to get married. As everyone knows I promote interracial love especially between a black woman and a white man. I’m a black woman of course. Happy Sunday! And Happy Loving Day!! Hip Hooray! Swirl Baby!

lovingdaylogo

 

Am I Ladylike?

Femininity- the quality of being female; womanliness

The other day I watched a video of Christelyn on black women and femininity after watching it I went to the mirror looked for a very long time. So many thoughts came over me like a huge typhoon. Am I ladylike with my background it’s a question that begs for an answer. My sister that’s second to me always behaved kind of tomboyish, she and I spoke on the phone pertaining to the subject. Yes talking on the phone with me can get so deep. Anyway she was telling me that regardless in her opinion she’s a woman that’s tough like a man who can be a lady.Hmmmmmm. Indeed it requires a woman to be tough especially being a single mother of boys. Like how does one balance the two?

I love my wigs, dresses, nail polish, earrings and toe rings to name a few. I feel like a woman of course femininity goes a lot deeper it’s attitude and it’s softness. It’s impossible to be soft when your life requires you to be the opposite. I am a single parent of two boys maybe I should get me some tea cups and have a tea party!! LMBO!! I love my sister’s attitude when I spoke to her I mean it’s a great outlook for her life her modo is she’s a woman that acts tomboyish at times it’s who she is and she’s fine with it. For me I want that softness and I do I just can’t be that way all the time. Perhaps I will find a way to be more dainty but I don’t want my sons copying me. My sons are boys definitely and they are teens therefore they know better. So yeah I’ll spend more time being softer. I know that I am a woman but I love being a lady. A black intelligent lady and I am very proud of who I am.