My Lane

As I get older I find myself traveling down memory lane, thinking of what could have been then I am bought back to reality, things are how they are supposed to be. When I was nineteen I attended college for a short time then I began working at a convenience store thinking what I was making was big money guess what? I wasn’t. I should have stayed in college I allowed my contentment with substituting pennies for dollars. I allowed my contentment for a small paycheck to be bigger than a career with the benefits of a 401k. I am now back in college with two children even though it’s never too late for a change. I can’t deny that my decisions has a lot to do with my present life.

Now that I am older I understand that I will follow through with my goals. I will run my race because I want to get to my destination which can’t be done trying to run someone else’s. I have grown. I trust God’s guidance and Not my own. I trust God with my life’s outcome. Every day I tell myself these things:
My life
My lane
My choices
My mistakes
My lessons
My testimonies
My destiny
My God shall direct my path and supply my every need.

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Victim or Victor?

First off I would like to share that I have four more courses left and I will receive my Bachelor’s degree. After I receive my Bachelor’s degree I will pursue a Master’s degree. I have to thank God for all that He has done for me!

Now that I have gotten that part out of the way, currently I am taking a course in Victimology. Victimology is the scientific study of physical, emotional, and financial harm people endure because of illegal activities. One of my discussion questions was about victim blaming. Victim blaming is when the victim is made responsible for a wrongdoing that occurred to them. Victim blaming isn’t always fair people who live in poverty are assumed to be lazy or unmotivated which isn’t always the case some things happen that’s beyond one’s control. This course got me to thinking a lot.

I grew up in a Christian home and I am very proud about this. Along the way in my life, I have made mistakes that had nothing to do with God. God gives us free will and I chose to live Not according to His Will so I paid the price. I made my bed so I have to lay in it until I get to where I am meant to be. I am not a person who constantly blame others and never myself. The victim role isn’t my thing I want to be victorious but it can’t happen if I am constantly blaming people and licking my wounds.

People may look at my life from the outside it may look one way but trust me it will turn out another way. People look at being rich in money and things as being successful that is not true being content is being rich. Rich people have more problems than anyone. Like Biggie said “More money more problems”. I would be happy just being able to take great care of my sons, be healthy, physically, mentally, and emotionally as well as number one has a relationship with God. Understand this it’s not about being rich in things I never will be, I am responsible for where I am and not God. I am rich because I have grown from my mistakes and I know better so I am doing better. God has given us so many examples that we can learn from like making mistakes in life is like losing weight change won’t happen overnight but if you stay consistent it will.

So what do I mean by all of this? Are we going to be a victim or victor? Have I made mistakes in the past? Yes. And I have grown from them. I probably will make mistakes in the future. We have to sometimes make wrong turns before making right ones. I choose to evaluate myself before I blame anyone else. I choose to be victorious!

Christ Like

The hardest thing in my life ever is my Christian walk. God is love, right? So why is walking with Christ so hard? Well I will tell you first of all it’s Not Christ that is the problem, it’s some of the people. Somewhere along the way some Christians have gotten things mixed up somehow. What does a Christian’s walk look like? What should a Christian look like? What is Christ like? I have been questioning this every since I decided to become more serious about my walk with Christ. First and foremost no two Christians’ walk are alike because no two people lives are the same. Every person on earth life has a story that can reach and touch certain people. Everyone has sinned. Everyone has won battles and are still fighting certain battles. One thing is for sure regardless of a person’s life, what a person may have done or who they are God can still use them. No one knows what God is doing in someone else’s life, remember Job in the Bible? Job “friends” thought the troubles in his life was his fault but it wasn’t.

We have to understand that we can know scripture back to front, we can say all the right things with the wrong heart and it has no value. We have to stay in the place of God’s love. God’s love is what leads a man to change to repentance. (Romans 2:4) I had a thought and I may be wrong but one of the most serious books in the Bible is Revelation. A lot of pastors don’t teach from it much but why is it at the very end and not the first book? Chances are if a person read Revelation first they probably would not want to read the rest of the Bible. Perhaps Revelation comes after all the other Books because every book prepares us and strengthens us for what’s to come.

Social media can be a great thing it gives people the ability to reach others with our opinions and information. However social media also makes it easier for people to beat each other down. Some Christians become fixated on how they think a Christian walk should look like. We need to not be so quick to judge someone else’s walk when we have no idea what God is doing in that person’s life. Most importantly no Christian should be afraid to shine a light in a dark place in order to reach others. No Christian should want to only reach people who look, think like them and have a little group because that’s not Christ like it’s cult like. Know the difference. I am constantly growing in the Lord. Who am I to judge a person with tattoos, a drug user or a promiscuous person? Who am I to try tell Brian “Head” Welch about his walk with Christ? God is using Brian Welch is in a mighty way. I don’t know what God is doing in his life. No one can tell me what God is doing in my life either just because I listen to all kinds of music does not mean that God cannot and isn’t using me. I don’t know what God is doing in my life in the future but I am ready for Him to use me.

Someone once said if you want to make God laugh tell Him the plans that you have for your life. After all God knew us before we was born. (Jeremiah 1:5) God directs our paths (Proverbs 3:). To answer all my questions I don’t know what a Christian walk looks like because I don’t know what God is doing in other people’s lives. If God was that easy to figure out why would we need Him? God ways and thinking is higher than ours. God loves us all and can save us all if we allow Him to. The last thing I ever want to do is be responsible for sending a person to hell because I turn them off from turning to Him based on my actions. If God can change me or anybody else why doubt what God can do in someone else’s life? Isn’t that placing limits on a limitless God we all need to be careful of how we treat other Christians and other people period. We all need to check our hearts constantly and love others always. We may be the only Christ that they see. Let’s help God to win souls and not lose them. God loves everyone. As Brian “Head” Welch said “God told him to look at the crowd of fans that they were all of His Children and He wanted to save them all”. Didn’t Jesus change the woman at the well and the woman who was caught in adultery? Did Jesus judge the Pharisees about stoning the woman who was caught in adultery?

1 Corinthians 8:1
Now concerning things offered to idols: We know that we all have knowledge. Knowledge puffs up, but love edifies.

All in Due Time

During this time of year many people get depressed for various reasons it could be the loss of a love one or they are just lonely. Losing a love one can be one of the most heartbreaking things that could ever happen. The holidays can make a person face the reality of many things that can’t be denied. A loving one not being around never gets easy we go on because there isn’t a choice.

The Emotions had a classic Christmas song called What do the lonely do at Christmas?, it gets to some single people, I guess. Being lonely and being alone are two different things, some people enjoy being alone. God has an appointed time for single people to connect with others. I remember when one of my friends told me how God wanted him to remain hidden which can be difficult when you want to be found. God’s timing is perfect everyone will not experience the same things at the same time. A clock has twelve numbers on it, there are 24 hours in a day, seven days and twelve months a year etc. As hard as things can be we have to trust God’s timing it’s perfect. Everything happens for a reason and everything happens when it is time. So in the meantime we should pray for the heartbroken and pray for the people who are lonely. We should also be happy for others I am a firm believer that how we behave when we are waiting for what we want is one of the biggest test of all.

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit (Psalms 34:18). It is encouraging to read what King David wrote in the previously quoted psalm. We can be healed and delivered from a broken heart.

Marriage is Beautiful

Lately I have been seeing negativity pertaining to marriage. I happen to come across the show Adam ruins everything which featured an episode about marriage. Adam dressed marriage up by calling it eternal love and further went on to say that people shouldn’t feel bad about a marriage failing because love is a temporary feel. I changed the channel immediately because Adam is Not ruining anything for me; I refuse to allow that mess to get into my spirit. Besides it has been shown that Adam and his stats were wrong about some cases, he owned up to it. We are living in a time where things are requiring less effort to get things done. It’s so easy for people to walk away from something instead of finishing what they have started. It doesn’t surprise me when people jump ship it surprise me when people stick and stay.

Currently I am taking a class pertaining to gender studies and it talks about the war between the two sexes. My first assignment is about my thoughts on gender roles which is kind of tricky I am a Christian so I trust God’s Word completely. In class we covered what we felt men and women should do. Here’s the thing why is it felt that women are not looked at as an equal just because she doesn’t do the same role as a man? I mean who said that it certainly wasn’t God. God loves us all equally just because we are called to do different roles doesn’t make anyone more superior over the other.

This is what is wrong with society there is nothing wrong with a wife allowing her husband to lead, I mean why not? The black community is filled with broken homes. How can a person who comes from a broken home have a healthy relationship unless God helps? Many black women who comes from broken homes want to lead the household because it’s what they are used to seeing. A wife being submissive to her husband doesn’t make her a slave. Some women use men abusing their power as a scapegoat these women are just stubborn. Furthermore, if a woman has trouble submitting to her man then don’t marry him but ask yourself this how come it’s easy to respect a supervisor on the job than the man you suppose to love? Why is it important for some women to feel the need to always have to be in control? Is it because they are afraid of being vulnerable?

It also doesn’t help marriage reputation with women who bash marriage and try to attempt to reduce marriage to being just a piece of paper; it’s more than that. Truth be told I think some of these women downplay marriage because they know that them getting married is less likely. So they try to fool people by cutting things off at the chase by making it seem as if it’s their choice. The best way to fool a fool is to let them think that they are fooling you. Ummmmm no sweetie it’s up to the man to give his last name to a woman that he feels is worthy of that. There is something about a man who steps up to the plate and making his one love his official love. There’s something about a man making his one love his Mrs. Who wants to be just another girlfriend landing in the girlfriend category? It’s like being the hottest song for a moment how about being the favorite song? A favorite song never gets old. A man in his lifetime has had several girlfriends being a wife now that special. Think about it.

So in conclusion Adam and no one else is going to get me to stop seeing the beauty of marriage. Marriage works because it was created by our Heavenly Father. Father knows best!!! If we allow God to guide us we can have the right husband or wife. The reason why there is so many divorces people have the wrong concept of marriage and therefore don’t value it like they should. So don’t get married if you are not ready and don’t get married to a person who doesn’t feel the same way about marriage as you do, otherwise the marriage will not make it.

Spot On

This morning one of my Facebook friends said something that was absolutely brilliant. In the past I have made posts pertaining to this subject as well however reading his post I never realized how huge the situation was. There are some men who pretend to be Christians but they are not. A real Christian man will not try to lure a Christian woman into a trap. Nevertheless his post said something like this “I see lots of posts from various ” good men “claiming they are on a quest to find their queen. If you are a good man then out of thousands of Facebook friends you should have a least one good woman. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s a game to manipulate more than one woman with selling chivalrous dreams.” My facebook friend’s post was spot on this morning this situation needs to be addressed more to raise awareness.

In order to have God as the glue in a marriage or relationship God has to be in both people. Christ must be trusted completely with every aspect of our lives including our love life. If we come across a person and feel that they are our love interest yet they are not a Christian then the relationship is not of God. If we continue to pursue something that isn’t of God then that’s acting out in the flesh and not in the spirit. We must trust God completely He has many wonderful things in store (including love) we just have to trust Him. If we trust Him then our faith should show all we have to do is believe.

People call it being judgmental but  I don’t feel that speaking on shacking up is wrong. If you are living with someone and you are not married as well as bring children into the world that is wrong. If a man has not married a woman but have children with her he’s still searching. People fail to realize it hurts the children deeply when their parents are not together. Regardless of a child’s age 3, 7, 11 or even 16 any number it still hurts them to not see their parents together. It’s especially hard for children when they feel as if they are pawns in between two parents who can’t co-parent in a civilized manner.

All these things starts with some men who claim to be a Christian but their actions don’t match. A man of God is suppose to be a leader who could never see himself hurting a woman of God who is trying her best on her walk with Christ. Don’t be a stumbling block be a positive step into the right direction in others lives. Remember one life touches another so light up someone else’s life. I don’t know about any other Woman of God but I refuse to play second class to a person who has a first class ticket to hell. I will not be a backup plan I’m not a computer. I have feelings. Men of God I’m not attacking you or putting men of the world down however you need to check yourself if men of the world’s morality beats yours. If you are a Man of God truly then walk the walk that you are called to do without cha cha dancing or electric sliding with the world.

Proverbs 27:17

Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

Forever Young

Anyone can make a change

Anyone can be use by God

Regardless of their age

Just ask Moses, Abraham or David

So you’re not a Christian

Okay Rosa Parks wasn’t a teenager

When she refused to give up her bus seat

Joyce Meyers was in her 30’s

When she received her calling

Vera Wang was 40

Julia Child published her book at 50

I could go on and on

Tune out the negative noise

God doesn’t stop using us

Because of our ages

Retirement is man made

God has no limits

As to how and when

He choose to use us

We just have to keep a head’s up

For when God will be calling

On us to do His work