It’s a Trend?

There are a few swirl groups that I belong to and I am glad that I am in them every day I am seeing more black women and white men getting together. I just seen a white man and a black woman get married, the wedding was so beautiful. It’s incredibly awesome seeing love win. Today in one of the groups a person asked when you see a swirl couple in public honestly how does that make you feel? I answered of course by saying that it makes me happy to see black women opening themselves up to other possible avenues to happiness. What we think is meant to happen may not happen like we expect. But we can never receive the happiness that we deserve by placing limits on who can make us happy.

I have already shared my background at a young age I told my mother that I was attracted to white men, she didn’t take it well at first. The same way children go through puberty and decides which sex they are attracted to, I discovered that I was attracted to white men. It’s just that simple. So, no I wasn’t hurt white men is what I have always preferred. Sorry that you can’t minimize my attraction to being bitter or hurt. Nice try though.
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In the 90s there wasn’t swirl groups or anyone I knew that could give me advice on dating interracially. Still I understand that it took for us to go through the 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s to get here today and I am extremely grateful.

If there is one thing that can grind my gears is a person downplaying or reducing a situation to nothing. When a person does that it’s a sign that they don’t want to face the reality of the truth. Recently, I read a comment on a video pertaining to interracial dating the commenter called black women and white men dating a trend. Dude are you serious right now?
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The commenter was a black man, now don’t get your feathers ruffled I am in no way saying that all black men have a problem with interracial dating. So chill out okay.
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I want black women to do whatever it is that makes them happy but let’s prove people wrong. Show the black men who thinks that white men and black women getting together is a trend that it isn’t a trend. The way to do this is to be totally attracted to white men to begin with. Black women should not date white men for stupid reasons like trying something new or if they have been hurt. I once knew a white guy who told me that a black woman only wanted to date him because she wanted a mixed child. Some people fail to realize that one life touches another if possible change a person’s life for the better not for the worse.

There are a lot of black women who are educated, speaks intellectually, attractive, have morals, can cook, and career driven etc. Every day I see black women breaking stereotypes about the so-called norms pertaining to us. It’s a great time to be alive. It’s a great time for white men and black women to be in love.

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Waiting to Be Forgiven

Learning the art of forgiveness can sometimes be a hard lesson to take. Everyone talks about the hurt that has happened to them and how they have trouble forgiving the person who has wronged them. Sadly we are living in a world where people are always the victim and they never accept accountability for anything. Still, does anyone ever think about how would it feel if the shoe were on the other foot? What if it’s you who is waiting to be forgiven? Is it ever too late to say that you are sorry? Whether it was unintentional or intentional everyone has hurt someone before. Nobody is above offending someone.

Yes. It’s always best to forgive after all forgiveness is for our peace of mind. It’s mentally exhausting stressing about something that we have no control over. Life is not like a dvd there are no alternate endings things are what they are. So there is no need to continuously regurgitate a situation.

I read a post about forgiveness that was interesting it almost sounded like a guilt trip. It said something about not blocking blessings by holding grudges aka unforgiveness in one’s heart. When we are the ones waiting to be forgiven we can’t speed up the process no matter how much it may hurt. Like a cut or bruise it takes time to heal.

I also thought about a television show that featured a situation that required forgiveness. A boyfriend caught his girlfriend kissing a close friend of theirs. The boyfriend was destroyed he loved his girlfriend so much. The girlfriend apologized and the boyfriend accepted it however he asked her for space. For weeks the girlfriend did everything that she could to make situations happen so that she could cross her boyfriend’s path. Finally the girlfriend built up the courage to talk to her boyfriend. She told him that it had been weeks and that she wanted to talk. The boyfriend called her out on her actions immediately telling her that he told her that he needed some space and that she only wanted to talk so that she could feel better about herself. He further went on to say that he knew that it was hard for her but it wasn’t his problem.

When we try to force a person to forgive us on our terms it can make the person that we offended question if our apology was even authentic. We have to remember that everyone is different and heal at different rates. This is why it’s important to respect a person’s space if they ask for it.

Forgiveness is a two way street. If we ever hurt someone we should apology quickly, own it, and make things right. When we own what we have done it should not be shared. Making a person share the blame for what we have done is never cool. Sometimes we can hurt a person so badly that it may actually burn a bridge and we have to move on. As we get older it should be about doing adult things like producing a healthy environment with the people that we care about. It’s childish and selfish to care only about ourselves. It’s important if we can to not do things that can jeopardize relationships with the people who we care about. I would rather spend my time enjoying the relationships that I have with people instead of waiting to be forgiven.

Simple Advice

Relationships, marriages, and Friendships are some of God’s Greatest invention
So take the time to enjoy them
Pick people who don’t have egos
Because it’s something that
They will never let go of
You are
Too priceless to care about the opinions
Of people that doesn’t
Add to your worth but subtracts
Forget that
Love is too beautiful
For a person to live
Their whole life
And never experience how it feels
Time is too short
To spend it on
A person that it wasn’t meant for
Hurt is too painful
To receive from someone
Who doesn’t care for you
Tears are too precious
To fall behind someone
Who’s not worth it
Tears should be of joy
No one should be
With a person
Whom they love
More than they love themselves
Because it will always show
Through their treatment
There just isn’t any respect
If a relationship or marriage
Isn’t Christ based
Why even entertain it
It will eventually
Turn out to be a waste
True love is never a mistake
The right one doesn’t
Make you feel as if you
Should be search for more
Because it feels like
Something is missing
The perfect one knows you
As well as you know yourself
They may not have the exact
Same interest as you
Still their awareness of them
Is important too
Know your worth
And don’t allow a person
To talk you down
You are not a piece
Of real estate
Never compromise
If your standards are too
High for a person tell
The person bye
The right one person
Will do what it takes
To have you
They recognize your value
If a person wants something
Or someone bad enough
They will do what
It takes to get it
Things will be if it’s meant
So never fall for a
Guilt trip
Save that feeling
For a cheat day of a diet
There is so much
Beauty in this world that was
Created by God Almighty
Not to share it with somebody
When you do find that
Special person
Give more
So that you two
Can build more
And search for ways
To keep your love strong

Happy Birthday to Princess Diana

She was a beautiful lady inside and out! Everyone loved Princess Diana that’s why she was called the people’s princess. She had an amazing fashion sense. She left a lasting impression on everyone that she came in contact with. One of my favorite pictures was of her and Mother Teresa. It was so sad when she passed away no telling what she would have been doing if she was alive today.

Happy Birthday Princess Diana.

Rest In Peace.

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The Headaches of Dating Interracially

The other day I saw a post from a white lady that said:

“Dear Black men and black women,
Why is that when love joins two people together of different races does this become a problem with you? You say that you love and serve God yet your hatred from the unity of two people in love says differently. God didn’t teach this. If you hate on others it is like hating yourself. Stop that. Stop creating problems where there is no problem. Leave people to live, love and to be free. It’s as simple as that. I love you all and God loves you most. Be good and kind to each other. As God says love one another as you love ourselves. Amen”

I have nothing against this lady she’s wonderful but she really got me to thinking. Especially about people’s true thoughts on interracial dating. On Youtube videos of Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex they are filled with hateful words some are from white people who are calling her racist names. Meghan is half black and half white, yet they look at her as being completely black. Which to me is racist. Why can’t Meghan be seen for the person that she is? Racist people can’t do it, that’s why.

Now I am not sure of what exactly she saw that made her post this. However, I could give a hill of beans about who black men date or marry. I am not into black men and they can date whomever they choose. I hope that they feel the same way about black women too. It’s crazy to me. This lady addressed black people it’s highly doubtful that she saw Chelsy Davy’s face. Please don’t tell me that it was just because Harry was getting married either. In case a reminder is needed of Chelsy’s expression at Prince Harry and Meghan’s wedding. Her facial impression was so apparent that it produced a sea of memes.
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I remember when a white guy that I was talking to said that everyone is a little racist. I’m not sure whether or not that it’s really true. I do know by this lady making a post it could mean a few things mostly that she saw something that a black person did.

If we look at the rate that black men date out people are used to it. Most people are used to seeing black men with women of other races. Black women are just becoming comfortable with opening up their dating options. I have experience dating white men and I have gotten stares from black men as well as white women. So it’s not a black people thing only, it’s a racial thing that shows when people of different races are dating.
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Happy Birthday Lil Sis

Happy Birthday to my lil Sis
You are a gift
That is tremendous
Anyone who gets to meet you
Should consider themselves blessed
You are you unapologetically
I am glad that God sent
You to me
In the past
I have spoken about
The few ups and downs
That we have encountered
But over the years
I have came to realize
That no one has
A relationship that’s perfect
It’s about how people
Care enough to
Work through things
And bounce back
Stronger than ever
To get things resolved
So that misunderstandings
Never happen again
You are not just
My lil sister
But my best friend
A bond that goes
Beyond blood
It’s something
That runs deeper
It’s about who is
In my heart
And that is where you are
This is why I made
You this card
Because these words
Aren’t found in Hallmark
Happy Birthday
I love you more than words can say

For the Time That We Are Here

Lit a candle in remembrance
Of all the people
Who passed away
Someone’s best friend
Someone’s wife or husband
Someone’s brother, sister, or cousin
Someone who was held near and dear
The pain of loss
Can put anybody into tears
And then here comes the fears
The realization
Of how short life is
Becomes painfully clear
Some people prepare
By having a relationship with Jesus Christ
Some people prepare
By getting life insurance
Some people prepare
In others ways
And all of these things are great
Regardless of what people
Do as ways to prepare
What do we do
For the time that
We are still here
Life is precious
It should not be spent
Wasting time
On hate
On grudges
On fear
We should live
A life that is filled with love
A life with a heart of forgiveness
A life that is lived fearless
Forgetting about the things
That we cannot fix
It shouldn’t have to take
The passing of someone special
To realize this
We should live life
Appreciating the people
Today before they go away
There are not many
Opportunities for second chances
So when they present
Themselves grab them
All while enjoying the lives
That we are blessed with
Because it’s a gift