The Love Dare

Anthony,
I decided to step back not because I don’t care about you because I do (very much so) I didn’t want to add to the confusion in your life it’s not what you need or deserve. From what you have shared with me it sounds like it’s very chaotic in your life after all this time I will touch back on that part later. There were so many times that I wanted to reach out to you, but I opted not to. Any decision that you choose should be yours alone, and no one should influence that I don’t care who the person is. What is meant to happen will find its way, and nothing or no one can stop what will be.

I am not going to preach, but I know that God is real He changed me whether you ever get to the point that you believe in Him that is entirely up to you. You have said “that all you wanted was to be able to talk to me.” it just wasn’t the right time. I admit it I was wounded, I was angry, and I was in my feelings God had to work on me it wasn’t a good time. I always felt like I had to fight for you, and I always felt like I wasn’t good enough; we both know the reasons why. Recently, I have asked you to please come to me if you have any questions about me don’t listen to anyone because messengers have motives. When someone tells you something, especially when it’s negative wonder what their motivation is because most times it’s not positive.

Anthony, when we got together, we were so very young. Once we got married, we had no guidance no one ministered to us about anything, which is why I want to counsel couples about marriage. Couples should know what real love is, so they will know how to love each other. I genuinely believe that any marriage can last; it’s what God intended; that’s why He hates divorce. All people have to do is put their egos aside and love their spouses enough. Everyone has days when they are unlovable, and that’s when the test comes in. If we can’t be real with our loved one, there is a problem; it’s imperative to allow them to be able to express their feelings. People have to understand that once a person chooses to marry them, they can’t stop learning about them because we change every day we can’t stop trying to keep their heart just because we feel that we have won it.

I want you to know that every couple has communication problems, not just us when we were a couple. Communication breakdowns will happen because people have different personalities; thus, differences will occur. People have to care about fixing the problem. Every marriage gets bland, has struggles, people get selfish, but people should never forget about the special spark that was the reason why they got married. After all, let’s be honest; no two people get married because they hate each other. Marriage is a covenant, not a contract. It’s not something that is of convenience, marriage is hard, but it’s beautiful too. When people get married, it’s for better or worse, and well we all know the rest of the vows the truth is people only focus on the good parts which is the reason why they can’t handle the hard parts once they occur.

Regardless of the situation good or bad, the Bible says that all things work together for the good. Something good will come from out of all of this, and we all will see it, respect it, accept it, and hopefully grow from it. I will not talk about the past because there is nothing that we can do about that accept grow from it. I will not attack you because I have forgiven you. I won’t fight over you or start drama because God already knows what He is going to do. Also, I know the woman that I am there is no need for all of that. All I can do is trust God. I will say this a real woman who is doing what she should do should never allow her man to ever feel uncomfortable not at our ages. I’m not saying these things because of our history but because I have gained wisdom. If a woman is laying a foundation with her man, she lets everyone know what’s up no matter who they are. She makes everyone respect him because she understands that what a man desires the most is to be respected. She knows that a man goes through enough in the world and shouldn’t have to deal with it at home too. You know why I am saying what I am saying it doesn’t matter how much a person has done for you if they care and it’s from the heart why should it matter? Unless strings are attached to what a person does, perhaps? You are not a lazy man, and you pull your weight. I pray that what I have written frees you to do what you need to do. We are grown-ups there is no room for foolish games life is entirely too short for that. I am expressing myself, and I don’t think that I am putting myself out there; I am not begging you for anything. I am putting this out here on my blog for the whole world to see. Remember, love isn’t a fight; it’s worth fighting for if it’s right. Love is also an action word. Love isn’t a guilt trip or forced; it’s given freely, it’s not a headache, and it flows without problems.

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Autumn

Autumn is my favorite
Of all four of the seasons
Gone are the signs of Summer
The extremely hot and humid weather
With not many breezes
To give some sort of relief
From the uncomfortable
And sometimes unbearable heat
Is it fine if it is
Someone else’s favorite season
Absolutely
But I have trouble believing
That someone would
Choose summer over autumn
What’s not to love?
However to each their own
Thankful that summer is over
And it’s not about having
A beach body
Happy for a season
That requires wearing warm clothing
I be looking forward
To wearing sweaters
As well as
Wondering to myself
Whether or not if it’s
All right to wear my boots yet
Different colored leaves
Falling from soon to be bare trees
Attempting to find out
How many leaves that I can catch
Toasting marshmallows on
Enormous bonfires that contain what
Seems to be eternal flames
Long starry nights
Crisp aired breezes
Everything with pumpkins
Pumpkin pies and don’t
Forget the pumpkin spiced coffee
Mostly importantly football season
So allow autumn
To occupy its place
It’s only for about 89 to 93 days
Just appreciate it’s brief moment
Because in a blink of an eye
It will be gone without
A trace
Then winter will
Begin to whisper
Of it’s arrival
The only hint of autumn that will
Be around are memories
Which can’t be whisked away
Like a rake did to the leaves
That once flew down streets,
Sidewalks, and walkways
If I had my way
Autumn would never go away

A New Start

I absolutely love being a Christian. I was having a conversation today and it was pertaining to a person’s past. First of all we alllllllll have parts of our lives that we would not like to read out loud. But guess what? We don’t have to this it is a new day, week, month, year. God has forgiven us and we have to forgive ourselves. I know it’s not always easy to do. For me there are good days and there are bad days. But everyday that passes I am glad that Christ are in them.

I feel that with all the things that I have been through and overcame there isn’t a person in this world that Christ can not save.

2 Corinthians 5:17King James 

17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

We should never beat ourselves up about anything and we should never allow anyone else to do it either. Once Christ forgives us for our past what others think is irrelevant unless we have done harm to that person. Still to judge a person based on past events isn’t right. We are our biggest critics we can do a good job of making ourselves feel guilty enough. Don’t need people on the outside doing it as well. My modo is if there’s people who continue to bring up the past then they should be left there.

Real Christian?

Will the real Christians please stand up? Do you know how many people consider themselves Christians? There are 2.4 billion people in the world who follow Christianity. Christians and people of the world seems to think they know what a real Christian is.

I don’t pay attention to the people of the world because they don’t believe in Christ so their opinions are invalid. They use people as an excuse to not have a relationship with Christ. I can’t take people seriously who use others as an excuse instead of just saying that they don’t want to follow Christ.

Every day I see certain Christians make a big deal about things like hair color just a couple of weeks ago Erica Campbell debuted her pink hair. There were so many people in an uproar claiming that she looked too “worldly”. Erica Campbell is one half of the gospel group Mary Mary. Mary Mary makes music that everyone can enjoy no telling how many people that they have brought to Christ. For the record I felt that she looked fantastic. The pink hair that she wore was from her hairline called Erica. So I’m thinking it could be about her making money in my opinion. I just can’t take some black Christians seriously. I’ll tell you why. Guess who used to rock pink hair unapologetically until she passed away?
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Jan Crouch founded TBN with her husband I never heard not even one black person say anything about her hair. As a matter of fact they made huge donations to TBN for years and probably still do. Some black people pick and choose what they want to get up in an uproar about.

The word Christian means Christlike resembling or showing the spirit of Christ. christly. christian – following the teachings or manifesting the qualities or spirit of Jesus Christ. No Christian will ever be perfect the bibles says it.Romans 3:10 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one. However it is still no excuse to fall short on purpose. Every day we should strive to do better on our walk with Christ.
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Christ will help us to get better on our walk if our heart is truly in it. My walk isn’t according to other Christians standards and definitely not by the world’s standards but God’s. People need not look at me if you aren’t looking to God first. Everyone lives and paths are different. I don’t know what Christ is doing in other people’s lives I’m concentrating on my own path while praying for others. Real Christians pray for one another and aren’t hurtful to one another. There is a saying that goes that a Christian may be the only Bible that a person reads. Which is interesting. The only person who was perfect in the Bible was Christ everyone fell short including David. So if I am the Bible that a person reads they will see that I’m a human being with a lot of faith in God just like Job had.

Happy 4th of July

Happy 4th of July! To Everyone! Blessings!

Now that I have gotten that part out of the way. Here we go! Here comes the “woke folks” talking about Independence Day. How our ancestors wasn’t free. Indeed, But we are free today.

I am getting to the point where I almost dread the hoildays because you can count on someone ruining it. People giving a history lesson and I guarantee that they flunked social studies in school. Go sit down somewhere and quit being a stick in the mud that stirs up junk.
stickinthemud3

If people have such a huge problem with Independence Day I tell you what don’t be off from work or cookout on the grill because that’s being a hypocrite.

Don’t get me wrong I am aware of the history that took place, I’m just not for division. Yes, my ancestors were slaves but that was back in the day. I refuse to walk around angry behind things that took place centuries ago. It’s like me walking around being angry about an ex from years ago. Some people have love for an abusive ex and forgives them. Yet these same people are angry at white people from centuries ago whom they never met? I’ll be honest I don’t know much about my ancestors my family didn’t keep track of it. Some people are so selective with what they choose to fight about. I’m like New Edition you can count me out!!!

Waiting to Be Forgiven

Learning the art of forgiveness can sometimes be a hard lesson to take. Everyone talks about the hurt that has happened to them and how they have trouble forgiving the person who has wronged them. Sadly we are living in a world where people are always the victim, and they never accept accountability for anything. Still, does anyone ever think about how would it feel if the shoe were on the other foot? What if it’s you who is waiting to be forgiven? Is it ever too late to say that you are sorry? Whether it was unintentional or intentional, everyone has hurt someone before. Nobody is above offending someone.

Yes. It’s always best to forgive after all forgiveness is for our peace of mind. It’s mentally exhausting stressing about something that we have no control over. Life is not like a DVD; there are no alternate endings things are what they are. So there is no need to regurgitate a situation continuously.

I read a post about forgiveness that was interesting; it almost sounded like a guilt trip. It said something about not blocking blessings by holding grudges aka unforgiveness in one’s heart. When we are the ones waiting for forgiveness, we can’t speed up the process no matter how much it may hurt. Like a cut or bruise, it takes time to heal.

I also thought about a television show that featured a situation that required forgiveness. A boyfriend caught his girlfriend kissing a close friend of theirs. The boyfriend felt destroyed; he loved his girlfriend so much. The girlfriend apologized, and the boyfriend accepted it; however, he asked her for space. For weeks the girlfriend did everything that she could to make situations happen so that she could cross her boyfriend’s path. Finally, the girlfriend built up the courage to talk to her boyfriend. She told him that it had been weeks and that she wanted to speak. The boyfriend called her out on her actions, immediately expressing that he told her that he needed some space and that she only wanted to talk so that she could feel better about herself. He further went on to say that he knew that it was hard for her, but it wasn’t his problem.

When we try to force a person to forgive us on our terms, it can make the person that we offended question if our apology was even authentic. We have to remember that everyone is different and heal at different rates. It’s essential to respect a person’s space if they ask for it.

Forgiveness is a two-way street. If we ever hurt someone, we should make an apology quickly, own it, and make things right. When we own what we have done, it should not be shared. Making a person share the blame for what we have done is never cool. Sometimes we can hurt a person so severely that it may burn a bridge and we have to move on. As we get older, it should be about doing adult things like producing a healthy environment with the people that we care about. It’s childish and selfish to care only about ourselves. It’s vital if we can to not do things that can jeopardize relationships with the people we care about. I would rather spend my time enjoying the relationships that I have with people instead of waiting to be forgiven.

Simple Advice

Relationships, marriages, and Friendships are some of God’s Greatest invention
So take the time to enjoy them
Pick people who don’t have egos
Because it’s something that
They will never let go of
You are
Too priceless to care about the opinions
Of people that doesn’t
Add to your worth but subtracts
Forget that
Love is too beautiful
For a person to live
Their whole life
And never experience how it feels
Time is too short
To spend it on
A person that it wasn’t meant for
Hurt is too painful
To receive from someone
Who doesn’t care for you
Tears are too precious
To fall behind someone
Who’s not worth it
Tears should be of joy
No one should be
With a person
Whom they love
More than they love themselves
Because it will always show
Through their treatment
There just isn’t any respect
If a relationship or marriage
Isn’t Christ based
Why even entertain it
It will eventually
Turn out to be a waste
True love is never a mistake
The right one doesn’t
Make you feel as if you
Should be search for more
Because it feels like
Something is missing
The perfect one knows you
As well as you know yourself
They may not have the exact
Same interest as you
Still their awareness of them
Is important too
Know your worth
And don’t allow a person
To talk you down
You are not a piece
Of real estate
Never compromise
If your standards are too
High for a person tell
The person bye
The right one person
Will do what it takes
To have you
They recognize your value
If a person wants something
Or someone bad enough
They will do what
It takes to get it
Things will be if it’s meant
So never fall for a
Guilt trip
Save that feeling
For a cheat day of a diet
There is so much
Beauty in this world that was
Created by God Almighty
Not to share it with somebody
When you do find that
Special person
Give more
So that you two
Can build more
And search for ways
To keep your love strong