I’m Not For Racism

I’m not for racism but I can’t stand hypocrisy either. Stupidity doesn’t work well for me. I have said this time and time again I hate the “N” word, no one should use it regardless of their race!

Yes. The CEO of Papa John’s was wrong along with everyone who uses racial slurs no one is better than a anyone else. Some black people use the “N” word but get up in an uproar when someone from another race uses it. What’s the difference? Can someone please explain this to me? I read a post from a person stating that they didn’t feel sorry for the CEO of Papa John’s that they don’t feel sorry for racists. Yet this person has never corrected the black people who uses the word. The person only talked about the “racist white people” who uses it. Well let me ask something is a black person who uses the “N” word racist? One needs to be careful about the reasons why it’s okay for black people to be able to use that word.

The definition of the “N” word is Slang: Extremely Disparaging and Offensive.
a contemptuous term used to refer to a black person.
a contemptuous term used to refer to a member of any dark-skinned people.

This is why I speak of the dysfunction within the black community some thinks it’s okay to use the “N” like they get a free pass. If this word is so offensive why is it okay for anyone to use it? I have some people who want to bully me because of my mentality it’s okay with me because I don’t take them seriously.

I get tired of all the foolishness that I see. Every time a white person gets caught saying a racial slur “it’s see I told you” but they don’t correct the black people who say it. I believe and I could be wrong but some people love to choose battles that are easy. Some black people know if they complain enough companies will fire people and apologize immediately. They won’t say anything to the black people who use the “N” because they may use it themselves or the feel that they are justified to use it.

Some people have a bullying spirit they are ready to jump on those who they can intimidate. Just like how some of these black men be on the internet calling black women names and talking about how they are. Some of these black men claim to care about the community but they don’t say a word to black men. The last time I checked the black community consisted of more than just the women. And no I’m not getting off track I’m talking about the hypocrisy that goes on.

When some black people get upset about another race using the “N” word and not their own. Isn’t that calling the kettle black? Come on now!!! People are good at holding up a mirror up at other people but would rather drop it and chance getting cut by glass before they are willing to face themselves.

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Selective Familyship

Don’t talk to me
About us being family
When a person
Being different
When diversity of thought
When not following the trend
Isn’t welcomed
Don’t talk to me
About our people
Being slaves
When in this
Current day
Some of you come up
With ways daily
To hurt your people
With memes and name calling
How black women
Are ugly, money grubbing,
Attitude, no hair or edges having,
Weave and wig wearing
Females with multiple
Children by different daddies
Warning anyone who will
Listening to stay away
Don’t believe me
Go look on social media
Search the internet
Things that are distorting
Black women’s image will be found
Which tugs at our self-esteem
For the whole world to see
It is the ultimate form of slavery
Bonded by the feelings
Of being unworthy
Of priceless things
Like love and respect
Public humiliation
At it’s finest
Some black men get on the internet
Proclaiming that black women
Just ain’t s***
For the record
I have two sons
By the same man
We got married
He went to prison
He got out
Guess where he is at
Yeap you guessed it
In another female’s bed
Taking care of another man’s kids
While acting like his kids
Don’t exist
When I share about
My history
It’s oh that’s why
She’s bitter and angry
There’s never any understanding
Some of you are
Worse than the Pharisees
Who caught the woman
In adultery
But the man that she was with
Got off scott free
It’s so sad
Nothing about this is funny
Ahhh the hypocrisy
Don’t talk about interracial dating
It’s almost like it’s a crime
For black women
To explore happiness
In some other locality
As if it’s poisioning
The black community
When some black men
Have been enjoying
Having cream in their coffee
Get some of them angry
That’s when things
Really gets ugly
And their true feelings
About you
Comes to the surface
But do you know
When they first had
These feelings
It was in the beginning
They didn’t just happen
And don’t get me
Started on the
Attacks that are used
As silencing tactics
I get so tired
Of being silent
So don’t come to me
With the our people mess
These selective battles
I just can’t stand it
It doesn’t make any sense
Stop being a hypocrite
I’m not for division
Amongst the races
Just leave me out of it
Claiming me
As your family
Or your people
Only when you see fit

It’s a Trend?

There are a few swirl groups that I belong to and I am glad that I am in them every day I am seeing more black women and white men getting together. I just seen a white man and a black woman get married, the wedding was so beautiful. It’s incredibly awesome seeing love win. Today in one of the groups a person asked when you see a swirl couple in public honestly how does that make you feel? I answered of course by saying that it makes me happy to see black women opening themselves up to other possible avenues to happiness. What we think is meant to happen may not happen like we expect. But we can never receive the happiness that we deserve by placing limits on who can make us happy.

I have already shared my background at a young age I told my mother that I was attracted to white men, she didn’t take it well at first. The same way children go through puberty and decides which sex they are attracted to, I discovered that I was attracted to white men. It’s just that simple. So, no I wasn’t hurt white men is what I have always preferred. Sorry that you can’t minimize my attraction to being bitter or hurt. Nice try though.
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In the 90s there wasn’t swirl groups or anyone I knew that could give me advice on dating interracially. Still I understand that it took for us to go through the 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s to get here today and I am extremely grateful.

If there is one thing that can grind my gears is a person downplaying or reducing a situation to nothing. When a person does that it’s a sign that they don’t want to face the reality of the truth. Recently, I read a comment on a video pertaining to interracial dating the commenter called black women and white men dating a trend. Dude are you serious right now?
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The commenter was a black man, now don’t get your feathers ruffled I am in no way saying that all black men have a problem with interracial dating. So chill out okay.
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I want black women to do whatever it is that makes them happy but let’s prove people wrong. Show the black men who thinks that white men and black women getting together is a trend that it isn’t a trend. The way to do this is to be totally attracted to white men to begin with. Black women should not date white men for stupid reasons like trying something new or if they have been hurt. I once knew a white guy who told me that a black woman only wanted to date him because she wanted a mixed child. Some people fail to realize that one life touches another if possible change a person’s life for the better not for the worse.

There are a lot of black women who are educated, speaks intellectually, attractive, have morals, can cook, and career driven etc. Every day I see black women breaking stereotypes about the so-called norms pertaining to us. It’s a great time to be alive. It’s a great time for white men and black women to be in love.

Love Isn’t

If I see another commercial for the new show Love is, I am going to scream. Love is a new show that will be on OWN the commercial is being played in heavy rotation. It looks like it’s about struggle love and well I won’t be watching it.

Guess who doesn’t seem to be enduring struggle love? Okay, I’ll give you a hint. The show Love is will be on her network. Yeap. Oprah. We all know goodness well that she wouldn’t take any kind of mess from no one especially from a man. She has been with Stedman for how many years? I’m pretty sure that she has never had to question Stedman’s love for her or take any kind of mistreatment. I bet he has proposed too. But she’s featuring struggle love on her network. Come on now.

We all know that most people mimic what they see on television. That’s why on commercials that displays crazy stunts there are small words on the bottom of the t.v screen saying please do not attempt because there are people who are silly enough to do it. Just look at the fire challenges and other crazy challenges.

Lets talk about what love isn’t it’s not a struggle because real love shouldn’t be. I for one am not glutton for punishment. Yeah I said it. One have to question their self-esteem if they are willing to put up with mistreatment. Some things are by choice whether we choose to accept this or not.

When I watch Maury and the women be on the show talking about the reasons why they feel that their men are cheating. I be thinking to myself how much more proof do you need? Why do you need a lie detector test? The boyfriend or husband is then brought on stage to tell their lie I mean their side of the story. Maury reads the results that these women already knew. Sometimes these men make out with a decoy knowing it’s a set-up but they don’t care. The women run backstage crying while the men are looking all stupid in the face and some be snickering. Why should it be such a power struggle between what you deserve and why you choose to settle for less? I just don’t get it.

What is going on? Now a days it’s about how much abuse is a person willing to take to prove their love, it’s crazy to me. We teach people how to treat us. A person who truly loves you would never want to see you hurt.
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Bottom line when you force yourself to be with someone who isn’t meant for you, you’re only prolonging what is meant. People have to know their worth and go for what they deserve. If you are feeling more hurt than love then you already know what to do, let it go.

The Headaches of Dating Interracially

The other day I saw a post from a white lady that said:

“Dear Black men and black women,
Why is that when love joins two people together of different races does this become a problem with you? You say that you love and serve God yet your hatred from the unity of two people in love says differently. God didn’t teach this. If you hate on others it is like hating yourself. Stop that. Stop creating problems where there is no problem. Leave people to live, love and to be free. It’s as simple as that. I love you all and God loves you most. Be good and kind to each other. As God says love one another as you love ourselves. Amen”

I have nothing against this lady she’s wonderful but she really got me to thinking. Especially about people’s true thoughts on interracial dating. On Youtube videos of Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex they are filled with hateful words some are from white people who are calling her racist names. Meghan is half black and half white, yet they look at her as being completely black. Which to me is racist. Why can’t Meghan be seen for the person that she is? Racist people can’t do it, that’s why.

Now I am not sure of what exactly she saw that made her post this. However, I could give a hill of beans about who black men date or marry. I am not into black men and they can date whomever they choose. I hope that they feel the same way about black women too. It’s crazy to me. This lady addressed black people it’s highly doubtful that she saw Chelsy Davy’s face. Please don’t tell me that it was just because Harry was getting married either. In case a reminder is needed of Chelsy’s expression at Prince Harry and Meghan’s wedding. Her facial impression was so apparent that it produced a sea of memes.
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I remember when a white guy that I was talking to said that everyone is a little racist. I’m not sure whether or not that it’s really true. I do know by this lady making a post it could mean a few things mostly that she saw something that a black person did.

If we look at the rate that black men date out people are used to it. Most people are used to seeing black men with women of other races. Black women are just becoming comfortable with opening up their dating options. I have experience dating white men and I have gotten stares from black men as well as white women. So it’s not a black people thing only, it’s a racial thing that shows when people of different races are dating.
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He’s My Baby Daddy

I wanted to hurry up and post this before father’s day because I don’t want to ruin the day with this news. Unless you have been living under a rock then you may have heard about the baby daddy greeting card Target drama. Yes, I call it drama because the situation is totally unnecessary. I don’t understand some of the people of my race. How come it’s okay for some of us to come up with words or be able to say certain words to one another but the minute a white person says it they are being racist? Yeah, I said it. For instance the “n” word is a very offensive word but some black people call one another that. Now stay with me I’m about to make a huge point.

I recently took a class and the subject came up about what is acceptable language socially. Long story short it was agreed upon that if it’s not acceptable socially then it should not be expressed verbally publicly. Still what is offensive? I have never liked the phrase “baby daddy”. I would cringe when I would hear some females say “oh he’s just my baby daddy”. There is nothing cool about having a baby daddy or for some mothers baby daddies. This phrase was suppose to be the new in words like “fleek” a word that I wish would go far away!!!
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There were classes that were being taught in school about Ebonics. It was taught so that other races of people could understand the blending of words ebony aka black and phonics sounds. The Britannica describes it as “a form of American English used in the home or for day-to-day communication rather than for formal occasions”. The Merriam-Webster refers to “baby daddy” as slang.

The Urban Dictionary defines “baby daddy” as a father of a woman’s child that she is not involved with” The sentence used to explained the meaning of the words went something like this “Who is that? “Girl two”. That’s my dumb baby daddy”. So if this word is in the urban dictionary and it’s being used in heavy rotation, what’s the big deal about the “baby daddy” greeting card?

Target is a retail department store that was trying to “target” or appeal to the people who uses this phrase. I feel that it’s beyond ridiculous that they had to apologize for a greeting card. The greeting card was sighted as being “racially insensitive”. How is a greeting card with “baby daddy” in it being racially insensitive? It was a phrase invented by a person or people of the black race. For goodness sakes. How is a “baby daddy” card racist? I wonder what was the race of the person who made the card? And what kind of father’s day cards would mothers who aren’t involved with their children’s fathers deem to be appropriate? I guarantee that many of them refer to their children’s fathers as their “baby daddy”. Frankly, I just don’t get it. Here’s what was inside of the greeting card:
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I could be wrong but I think that when something sheds light on things that are being celebrated within the black community that should not be. The reality of dysfunction becomes real then all of a sudden it comes off as being “racist” because the dysfunction of what is going on in the black community is being exposed even if it was done unintentionally. Getting all up in a uproar behind a greeting card just shows that the truth hurts.

Are We Obligated?

More and more I am seeing other people in my race asking this question “Are we obligated”. Just because we share the same skin color doesn’t mean that we support or think the same way.

I have always thought differently from the black collective. No, I don’t support things that will cause division. If a black person says people can support who they want in politics or people can love who they choose. They had better get ready for the pushbacks and attacks. The main attacks are the name calling and the public humiliation. It’s all silencing tactics and frankly no I don’t want to align myself with people who will attack as soon as you don’t agree about something.

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Here are the facts, yes white people have done things in the past but Not to me directly, the people who hurt me the most look like me. During the month of black history, there needs to be more honesty about what the black race did to each other.

In my opinion, we can never move forward as a race without placing the blame where it belongs. Everything isn’t the white people’s fault. Sorry but not sorry. I’m just being honest.