It’s Done

You and I are no longer
The indication
Of this grows stronger
Each day that passes by
There is no need for
Making any kind
Of insinuations
Pertaining to this situation
We are both guilty
Of the demise
Of our marriage
And it’s final destination
Yours was infidelity
Which I gave you
Multiple opportunities
Like the game of baseball
You always struck out
Mines was people pleasing
Doing whatever it took
To make my family happy
Even though it left
Our finances drowning
We both fooled ourselves
About what marriage
Was about
We got it wrong
We was young
We was dumb
This is without a doubt
God may not have
Ordained our marriage
However marriage doesn’t
Have to be ordained
For it to be valid
Marriage is a covenant
Made by God
He expects a
Full commitment
When two people
Enters into it
There will be ups and downs
That’s when a couple must fight
They can’t be weak
And throw in the towel
It’s only taking
The easy way out
Once two people come
Together under the law
Of marriage that
Is suppose to be it
I’m sorry that we wasn’t
Strong enough
I’m sorry that we couldn’t
Tough it out
Or understand
The importance of marriage
I’ll accept your apology
And I pray that someday
You will accept mine
There’s always room
For an apology
As long as it’s sincere
If a heart is open
There’s always room
For forgiveness
A testimony
Will come out of this
I am not sure
How or what it will be
Over time we will see

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Don’t Come For Me

Today I had a black man tell me that myself and other black women who choose to swirl deserves to be placed into an oven alive so we can burn. I know what you are thinking Tameeka “why do you care about what a troll says?” I’ll tell you why because like I have already been saying there is a problem within the black community. It’s hard for me as well as some of the other single mothers who have black sons. Many of us are fighting to make sure that our sons will be respectable and productive citizens. I have already shared that I have always been attracted to white men however I did have two children with a black man. One day I will tell the whole story in a book because it’s worthy of that. I will say this while I love my sons very deeply I do wish that they was blessed to have another father however they would not be who they are without having the father that they have. The main thing that needs to be said is this don’t come for me unless you know my story and you heard it come from me directly. I am Not ashamed of my battle scars the war has been won that part of my life is done. I am at the point in my life that I don’t mind talking about what I have been through if it can help someone else.

My sons are by the same man who I married as well. The marriage did not work out it is what it is, getting married is one thing staying married is another. What is the most important thing that needs to be understood is that sometimes in order to avoid what Not to do you must understand why you should Not do it. I had my oldest in 2001 and my youngest in 2003 that was before Facebook, Twitter and You-Tube. Today there is a wealth of information available that can help the generations after me. Understand this I have never told any black woman to date a black man only. I always say date the person who loves and treats you the best regardless of his skin color because love has no color. There is nothing wrong with a woman wanting to have a family it just has to be done properly. If hurricane Harvey wasn’t an eye opener I am not sure what will there were way too many single black mothers who were totally alone. I am a advocate for breaking the chains of broken homes because they are the destroyer of children’s tomorrows. Every child deserves to be brought up in an intact home. I do Not want any child to walk around with a hole in their heart that was created by their parent. Children can be repaired unlike most adults this is why broken homes must cease be eradicated all together.

Back on topic I remember when I told my mother that I was attracted to white men at first she had a hard time accepting it. My mother told me that she was afraid of me being hurt but as I told her any man can hurt you. The support of interracial dating that is out now wasn’t around in the 80’s and 90’s. Support strengthens people to be brave enough to stand up for what they believe is right think about it civil rights didn’t happen with just Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. acts alone. As black women we must pull together and lift one another up not looked down on other women who messed up. I know that there are some disrespectful black men who are on a vendetta to try to destroy us but they can’t do that as long as we band together. I want to see all black women happy and successful don’t judge me by my past. To know me now is to learn my past so you may learn from it the struggles that I encountered yesterday made me the woman who I am today and I am not ashamed. Hurt people, hurt others and healed people, heal others please know that I am healed woman.

I Don’t Want To

I don’t want to
Talk about a person
In the past tense
If I don’t have
A present history of praising
Them while they were alive
To do that is being fake
As President Washington once said
I cannot tell a lie
I don’t want to be
In contact with anyone
Who I have troubling complimenting
I don’t want to
Walk around with a
Heart that is full of unforgiveness
Having a heart like that is poisonous
I don’t want to have
Any dealings with people
Who has absolutely no concept
Of how precious life is
Because tomorrow is not promised
Why waste time time on hatred
Why not spend time
Working on forgiveness
And building off of one another’s strength
As we live
Why must it take
A person’s passing
For us to understand this
We have to love today
Admire today
Pray today
Hope today
Smile today
Makes someone who we care about
Day today
Life is too short
To be afraid to do
These things
So let the grudges go
Let the ego go
No one is promised tomorrow

Spare Tire

Society can try to dress up
Infidelity all it wants
Side chicks are not
The go to women
Like a spare tire
They are the least desired
A man pulls her out for a ride
When the original tire is
Out of commission
Due to being damaged
By the hands of the man
But as soon as the original
Is patched up
The spare tire immediately
Goes back into the trunk
Into the darkness
Where no one can see it
Because it’s an eyesore
Ladies don’t be a spare tire
You are worth so much more
Than being a backup plan
For a man
Who has trouble with commitment
Don’t be a secret
Go with an available man
The one whom you are
Destined to be with
Who will love you the most
One who will proclaim
His love for you
From coast to coast
Don’t do something
That you wouldn’t want
Done to you
Don’t be the go to
You are only being a fool

Whose Philosophy was Better?

I had an amazing conversation with one of my friends who is white. He is really concerned about the frequency of hate that is going on. I assured him that everything would be okay because things will be. He asked a interesting question it was whose philosophy did I agree with the most Martin Luther King Jr. or Malcolm X? I respect Malcolm X but I choose Martin Luther King Jr. it’s all about peace and love. The way that I think isn’t received well by some of the people of my race however there are some black people who think the same way as I do. A lot of the way that I think comes from the way that I was raised and my education too.

First off what happened in Charlottesville, Virginia was absolutely terrible everyone at least agrees on that. From my understanding the protest that was took place was pertaining to a confederate statue being removed forgive me if I am wrong. I have already written my views on the confederate flag. There are people who view the confederate flag as their heritage both blacks and whites. No,I do Not support hate I find it repulsive however everyone has the right to exercise their first amendment rights. Problems arise when things become violent which is never good.

Here’s the thing yes slavery took place and there was segregation years ago. Even though my mother grew up during the time of segregation; she was not racist. My mother did not raise me to hate anyone but to love everyone. I once went for classes to be able to volunteer at the YWCA one thing that stuck out during the classes was meeting people where they are. Positive things can happen when we meet people where they are. There are people my age bring up slavery and segregation we never encounter that; our ancestors did. There are white people my age and younger who feel like there have to pay for what their ancestors did. I will never forget one of my Facebook friend’s apologizing for what her ancestors did; it was heartbreaking. No one should have to feel like they have to pay for a debt of someone else’s wrong doing, ancestors or not.

It is time for our country to start healing together. All white people aren’t racist. All black people aren’t criminals. Healing cannot be done if salt continues to be applied to a wound. When we cut ourselves from a fall or a paper cut the body immediately begins the healing process. I have two sons and I want them to live in a world that is better than what’s going on now. Going into the past doesn’t solve anything if nothing positive is being done about it. Answering hate with hate does not solve anything. As the great Martin Luther King Jr. once said “Darkness cannot drive out darkness;only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

The Child Within

Children can get angry
They can fuss and fight
Yet play again later
I guess their awareness
Of friendship is greater
Than the way we as adults
Look at it
A child enjoys life to the fullest
As if there is no tomorrow
Even though
They are not yet aware
Of how limited time is
And that is why
They act like it
An adult is aware
Of how short time is
Yet we waste our time
On meaningless things
One of the biggest grudges
We have an clear understanding
Of the power of forgiveness
Yet will not use it
Children say how they feel
They keep their feelings real
We as adults many times
Because of past hurts
Conceal how we feel
A child will keep trying
To learning how to ride
A bike no matter
How times they fall
A adult will experience failure once
And never want to try again
What a terrible way to live
It is okay to allow our hearts
To lead as long as our minds
Guide it
It is so important not to forget
To stay in touch with
The child within