Eyes Wide Open

I’ve been so meaning to write about this for over a week now. I am not into celebrity news but I have written about Ciara a couple of times. Ciara changed her choice of men and found her prince.

In the past Ciara dated rappers Future and Slim Thug. Recently Slim Thug accused Ciara of marrying the Seahawk’s quarterback Russell Wilson for financial stability. This goes right back to my post from yesterday about how some black men waste good years on things that doesnt matter. Slim Thug further went on to call Russell Wilson “corny”. To guys like Slim Thug being a Christian, a one woman’s man and responsible is corny. This proves what I have being saying all along about the shortage of quality black men.

Slim Thug also said that women who date bad boys can’t date good guys. How much sense does that make? Remember the saying about kissing toads until finding a prince, making wrong turns before making a right one or experience is the best teacher. We are not our past some people refuse to allow people to be happy. Another thing what are bad boys about? So because they don’t want to change the women who date them doesn’t deserve better? Is he saying that bad guys aren’t about anything or that they can’t change? Many questions can come from what Slim Thug is saying and they aren’t good ones. Words are like a boomerang when you throw them at others they come back.

As we get older we realize what’s important and what’s not. Sadly some people never get it and they never mature. I love Ciara response to all of her haters and butt hurt exes:
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Being cool isn’t having children all over the place that are not receiving hands on parenting, sleeping around, or hanging out in the streets wasting time.

There are some people who don’t want to change for the better and get jealous of the people who do. These same people will attempt to instill fear into others or destroy their happiness. They have wasted so much time until they don’t have a enough to make up for what’s lost. Life is too short to be in struggle love or poverty. There is more to life and it isn’t just heartbreak or paying for poor choices. When we learn from our mistakes our growth is our reward and we reap a harvest that is plentiful. The people who don’t want to learn this life lesson are just plain pitiful.
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A Year Ago Today

At times life
Can seem so unfair
When a person passes away
It becomes so clear
That we all
Have very little time here
In a blink of an eye
We go from being our parent’s babies
To holding our very own children
No matter how a person
Touches our lives
Their importance
Becomes apparent
When the person
Is no longer here
To bless us with
The very things
That we hold
So near and so dear
One life touches other
Even though we sometimes
Don’t realize
How significant
That we are
Which is why loss
Hits like a ton
Of bricks
Crashing in
Weighing heavy on our hearts
We are never ready
But why should we be
We are not ready
To set a person free
Today is Chris Cornell’s birthday
He is missed today
As much as he was when
He passed away
Perhaps even more
I wish that
He could tell his family
That he loves them
One more time
I wish that
He could huge them
And not let go
I wish that we could
Get a chance to
Hear him sing live
One more time
I wish that we all
Could witness his smile
To listen to lyrics
That he wrote
Which were pulled
Deep from within his soul
All of us fans feeling like
We can relate
And admire him
For expressing his feelings
I wish he could be here
So we could all let him
Know how much that he is valued
And that he’s not alone

What’s Really the Problem?

Not too long ago I wrote about a post that a white woman wrote addressing black people. She questioned why some black people had an issue when one or the other dates outside of the race. It was definitely crazy how she pointed that out.

The Justin McClure’s situation has gotten crazy and nerve racking. Like leave that man in peace to love his family. It’s sickening how some of the people from the black community are behaving. I question what’s really the issue. To be honest the only people that he needs to answer to is his family.

I’m not giving up on hope for some black women they will come around eventually. I can’t name all of the things that my mother used to tell me and now I see what she meant. We have to extend the same courtesy to others because none us woke up and just got something. A lot of the reasons why we make the choices that we make is because something influenced it. Most people ask for advice for a reason whether they choose to accept it is another.

Why do some black people take delight in other people’s pain? It’s disgusting because it’s only exposing how people truly are. Waiting to be able to say I knew that they wasn’t perfect. Well who told you to put a human being on a pedestal so high done with the hopes that they will fall. Just so you can talk about it. Blackheartedness that is plain ugly. Vengeful spirited people scare me because they obsess about destroying a person. They don’t stop until their vengeance is fulfilled. And do you know what’s even more scary how hungry that they are about making it happen. Literally starving almost foaming at the mouth like a ravage dog. Instead of putting that kind of energy into leading a productive life. Some people are so freaking spiteful.

My mother used to say that some black people are like crabs in a basket. Crabs in a basket means a syndrome where a group of like situated people hurt those in their community attempting to get ahead. Often this is applied to people in an impoverished community where one person is starting to get ahead. The collective community becomes jealous or filled with a sense of self-loathing, so they find a way to pull that person back down to the community’s level.
When harvesting crab, the crab as a group will pull down any crab that starts to climb out of the barrel in an attempt to be the first out of the barrel that holds them in, hence crabs-in-a-barrel.

My mother dated only black men she wasn’t a swirler but she was a truth teller. She was born in the 50s so she witnessed a lot of stuff pertaining to some black people. Is that the problem? Some black people have a crab in a basket syndrome? If that is not the case then quit going after other people’s happiness as if you are on a witchhunt. Level up in the spirit regardless of your beliefs that way you’ll learn to be in competition with yourself and not obsess about destroying others.

Our History

A past is something that we all have. Today will be yesterday by this time tomorrow. Will I make a mistake? Will I offend someone? Will I overcook my broccoli? Will I wear my wig wrong and never be able to live it down? Will someone have a problem with the way that I lived my life ten years from now? When I get into a relationship how much of my past is owed to my partner? If I have worked my past out with God why should I have to dig up old bones again? I am not trying to pull out skeletons that are in my closet and lay them across the bed like a wardrobe. Explaining this mistake and that mistake. Really?! I am torn about this subject. I have so many questions and feelings.

In the news there has been waves made about this amazing Youtube couple name Justin and Ami McClure. Mr. and Mrs. McClure are a interracial couple who has a set of twins and a son. Recently, Mr. McClure’s past came back to haunt him. Many years ago before Mr. McClure got married he made some racist tweets about black people and black women. This situation has caused a media frenzy and I pray that their marriage can withstand this situation. I believe that Mr. McClure learned from his mistake there are many who refuse to allow him to live it down. It is obvious that he loves his family. This man adopted the twins if that doesn’t show that he’s a man of substance I don’t know what will. There are a lot of men who don’t take care of their children and he’s not one of them. Just Sayin.

It’s funny how last night I kind of got into a small debate about women who have been divorced giving a single or married couples advice. The guy felt that a divorced woman couldn’t give advice because her marriage didn’t last. As if a wife is solely responsible for keeping a marriage together. A person can’t keep a person who doesn’t want to be kept. In my opinion marriages end every day for different reasons. If a man cheats should a woman stay? If a woman cheats should a man stay? If a man is a drug addict should a woman stay? I get tired of one sided people. This man calls himself a Christian yet it’s the wife’s fault if a marriage falls apart? What happened to the husband being the head bruh? One of his female facebook’s friends jumped on the post coming for me. SMH! Ummm Sis. You go right ahead on and talk to yourself. Long story short I believe that experience is the best teacher. A mistake is a mistake no matter what kind that it is. Oh we can choose what a mistake is now? Suppose people got married young and things didn’t work out? Maybe the people who got married young can give advice about why getting married young was a bad choice. The base word of message is mess. A message can’t happen without a mess happening. We can learn from the past that’s why they teach history in school.

I don’t know about anyone else but I refuse to be bonded by my mistakes. I’m not going to keep reliving things. I might get involved with a partner and have to explain something that happened years ago? I don’t think so. If a person was married before okay then they should share that information. No one wants to have their past dug up. Our present is a gift that affects our future. The past is over and we have to be careful of people who are out to hurt us. Mr.McClure’s tweets are many years old and no I am not saying it’s okay. All I am asking is how long do we have to keep reliving something that is over? And why is it that some people gets a quicker pass than others? They will extend the courtesy a million miles long for certain people. I refuse to not live my life to the fullest out of fear. I have dealt with my past as far as I am concerned if there is nothing in my past that will hurt my partner later then there is nothing to discuss. Cars don’t drive backwards. People don’t walk backwards. So why should I live my life constantly looking back. Everyone has made mistakes and will continue to do so it’s called being human. The worst thing about a mistake is if nothing was learned from it. So I am erasing my past mistakes unless they can be useful to somebody else, besides that there is no need of studying my past one won’t be able to earn a degree from it.
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Meathead

If you have ever watched All in the Family you are aware of Mike and Archie’s relationship. Mike was married to Archie’s daughter Gloria. One day Archie got really angry with Mike and said you sir are a meathead. Mike asked Archie what a meathead was. Archie replied dead from the neck up. According to the Webster’s dictionary a meathead is a stupid person.

Archie use to accuse Mike all the time of acting like he was above people because he was so smart.

One day Archie came clean and admitted the truth which was that he was jealous of Mike. Archie never finished school and he had to work. The only time Archie got the chance to do what he wanted was when he bought a bar and that was late in his life.

I remember the other day reading a post about people who act like they are superior to others. I do admit it happens at times once in awhile. However is the person acting superior or are they smart and the person has a Archie complex? Hmmm. It’s something to think about.

I don’t know about anyone else but I never want a person to downplay who they are in order to make myself feel comfortable. There is always going to be someone who is more smarter, more beautiful, and more talented etc. it’s about being confident in one’s self. Confident people are not threaten by other people’s abilities or qualities.

I always complement people. If a women is beautiful I tell her that she is being jealous isn’t going to change it. I’m thankful that I have never been a jealous person. Jealousy is a waste of energy.

When a person is intimidated by someone else because of the talents that God blessed them with they are the ones who are meatheads.

Happy 4th of July

Happy 4th of July! To Everyone! Blessings!

Now that I have gotten that part out of the way. Here we go! Here comes the “woke folks” talking about Independence Day. How our ancestors wasn’t free. Indeed, But we are free today.

I am getting to the point where I almost dread the hoildays because you can count on someone ruining it. People giving a history lesson and I guarantee that they flunked social studies in school. Go sit down somewhere and quit being a stick in the mud that stirs up junk.
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If people have such a huge problem with Independence Day I tell you what don’t be off from work or cookout on the grill because that’s being a hypocrite.

Don’t get me wrong I am aware of the history that took place, I’m just not for division. Yes, my ancestors were slaves but that was back in the day. I refuse to walk around angry behind things that took place centuries ago. It’s like me walking around being angry about an ex from years ago. Some people have love for an abusive ex and forgives them. Yet these same people are angry at white people from centuries ago whom they never met? I’ll be honest I don’t know much about my ancestors my family didn’t keep track of it. Some people are so selective with what they choose to fight about. I’m like New Edition you can count me out!!!

Love Isn’t

If I see another commercial for the new show Love is, I am going to scream. Love is a new show that will be on OWN the commercial is being played in heavy rotation. It looks like it’s about struggle love and well I won’t be watching it.

Guess who doesn’t seem to be enduring struggle love? Okay, I’ll give you a hint. The show Love is will be on her network. Yeap. Oprah. We all know goodness well that she wouldn’t take any kind of mess from no one especially from a man. She has been with Stedman for how many years? I’m pretty sure that she has never had to question Stedman’s love for her or take any kind of mistreatment. I bet he has proposed too. But she’s featuring struggle love on her network. Come on now.

We all know that most people mimic what they see on television. That’s why on commercials that displays crazy stunts there are small words on the bottom of the t.v screen saying please do not attempt because there are people who are silly enough to do it. Just look at the fire challenges and other crazy challenges.

Lets talk about what love isn’t it’s not a struggle because real love shouldn’t be. I for one am not glutton for punishment. Yeah I said it. One have to question their self-esteem if they are willing to put up with mistreatment. Some things are by choice whether we choose to accept this or not.

When I watch Maury and the women be on the show talking about the reasons why they feel that their men are cheating. I be thinking to myself how much more proof do you need? Why do you need a lie detector test? The boyfriend or husband is then brought on stage to tell their lie I mean their side of the story. Maury reads the results that these women already knew. Sometimes these men make out with a decoy knowing it’s a set-up but they don’t care. The women run backstage crying while the men are looking all stupid in the face and some be snickering. Why should it be such a power struggle between what you deserve and why you choose to settle for less? I just don’t get it.

What is going on? Now a days it’s about how much abuse is a person willing to take to prove their love, it’s crazy to me. We teach people how to treat us. A person who truly loves you would never want to see you hurt.
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Bottom line when you force yourself to be with someone who isn’t meant for you, you’re only prolonging what is meant. People have to know their worth and go for what they deserve. If you are feeling more hurt than love then you already know what to do, let it go.