Marriage is Beautiful

Lately, I have seen negativity about marriage. I happen to come across the show Adam ruins everything which featured an episode about marriage. Adam said that love isn’t eternal and further went on to say that people shouldn’t feel bad about a marriage failing being that love is a temporary feeling. I changed the channel immediately because Adam is Not ruining anything for me; I refuse to allow that mess to get into my spirit. Besides it has been shown that Adam and his stats were wrong about some cases, he owned up to it. We are living in a time where things are requiring less effort to get things done. It’s so easy for people to walk away from something instead of finishing what they have started. It doesn’t surprise me when people jump ship; it surprises me when people stick and stay.

Currently, I am taking a class about gender studies, and it talks about the war between the two sexes. My first assignment is about my thoughts on gender roles, which is tricky. I am a Christian, so I trust God’s Word completely. In class, we covered what we felt men and women should do. Here’s the thing why is it felt that women are not looked at as an equal just because she doesn’t do the same role as a man? I mean who said that it certainly wasn’t God. God loves us all equally just because we are called to do different roles doesn’t make anyone more superior over the other.

Society needs to understand that there is nothing wrong with a wife allowing her husband to lead, I mean why not? The black community is filled with broken homes. How can a person who comes from a broken home have a healthy relationship unless God helps? Many black women who come from broken homes want to lead the household because it’s what they are used to seeing. A wife being submissive to her husband doesn’t make her a slave. Some women use men abusing their power as a scapegoat; these women are just stubborn.

Furthermore, if a woman has trouble submitting to her man then don’t marry him but ask yourself this how come it’s easy to respect a supervisor on the job than the man you suppose to love? Why is it essential for some women to feel the need always to have to be in control? Is it because they are afraid of being vulnerable?

It also doesn’t help marriage reputation with women who bash marriage and try to attempt to reduce marriage to being just a piece of paper; it’s more than that. Truth be told I think some of these women downplay marriage because they know that them getting married is less likely. So they try to fool people by cutting things off at the chase by making it seem as if it’s their choice. The best way to fool a fool is to let them think that they are deceiving you. Ummmmm no sweetie it’s up to the man to give his last name to a woman that he feels is worthy of that. There is something about a man who steps up to the plate and making his one love his official love. There’s something about a man making his one love his Mrs. Who wants to be just another girlfriend landing in the girlfriend category? It’s like being the hottest song for a moment how about being the favorite song for all time? A favorite song never gets old. A man in his lifetime has had several girlfriends being a wife now that special. Think about it.

So, in conclusion, Adam and no one else is going to get me to stop seeing the beauty of marriage. Marriage works because our Heavenly Father created it. Father knows best!!! If we allow God to guide us, we can have the right husband or wife. The reason why there is so many divorced people have the wrong concept of marriage and therefore, don’t value it as they should. So don’t get married if you are not ready and don’t get married to a person who doesn’t feel the same way about marriage as you do. Otherwise, the marriage will not make it.

It’s Done

You and I are no longer
The indication
Of this grows stronger
Each day that passes by
There is no need for
Making any kind
Of insinuations
Pertaining to this situation
We are both guilty
Of the demise
Of our marriage
And it’s final destination
Yours was infidelity
Which I gave you
Multiple opportunities
Like the game of baseball
You always struck out
Mines was people pleasing
Doing whatever it took
To make my family happy
Even though it left
Our finances drowning
We both fooled ourselves
About what marriage
Was about
We got it wrong
We was young
We was dumb
This is without a doubt
God may not have
Ordained our marriage
However marriage doesn’t
Have to be ordained
For it to be valid
Marriage is a covenant
Made by God
He expects a
Full commitment
When two people
Enters into it
There will be ups and downs
That’s when a couple must fight
They can’t be weak
And throw in the towel
It’s only taking
The easy way out
Once two people come
Together under the law
Of marriage that
Is suppose to be it
I’m sorry that we wasn’t
Strong enough
I’m sorry that we couldn’t
Tough it out
Or understand
The importance of marriage
I’ll accept your apology
And I pray that someday
You will accept mine
There’s always room
For an apology
As long as it’s sincere
If a heart is open
There’s always room
For forgiveness
A testimony
Will come out of this
I am not sure
How or what it will be
Over time we will see

I Don’t Want To

I don’t want to
Talk about a person
In the past tense
If I don’t have
A present history of praising
Them while they were alive
To do that is being fake
As President Washington once said
I cannot tell a lie
I don’t want to be
In contact with anyone
Who I have troubling complimenting
I don’t want to
Walk around with a
Heart that is full of unforgiveness
Having a heart like that is poisonous
I don’t want to have
Any dealings with people
Who has absolutely no concept
Of how precious life is
Because tomorrow is not promised
Why waste time time on hatred
Why not spend time
Working on forgiveness
And building off of one another’s strength
As we live
Why must it take
A person’s passing
For us to understand this
We have to love today
Admire today
Pray today
Hope today
Smile today
Makes someone who we care about
Day today
Life is too short
To be afraid to do
These things
So let the grudges go
Let the ego go
No one is promised tomorrow

Whose Philosophy was Better?

I had an amazing conversation with one of my friends who is white. He is really concerned about the frequency of hate that is going on. I assured him that everything would be okay because things will be. He asked a interesting question it was whose philosophy did I agree with the most Martin Luther King Jr. or Malcolm X? I respect Malcolm X but I choose Martin Luther King Jr. it’s all about peace and love. The way that I think isn’t received well by some of the people of my race however there are some black people who think the same way as I do. A lot of the way that I think comes from the way that I was raised and my education too.

First off what happened in Charlottesville, Virginia was absolutely terrible everyone at least agrees on that. From my understanding the protest that was took place was pertaining to a confederate statue being removed forgive me if I am wrong. I have already written my views on the confederate flag. There are people who view the confederate flag as their heritage both blacks and whites. No,I do Not support hate I find it repulsive however everyone has the right to exercise their first amendment rights. Problems arise when things become violent which is never good.

Here’s the thing yes slavery took place and there was segregation years ago. Even though my mother grew up during the time of segregation; she was not racist. My mother did not raise me to hate anyone but to love everyone. I once went for classes to be able to volunteer at the YWCA one thing that stuck out during the classes was meeting people where they are. Positive things can happen when we meet people where they are. There are people my age bring up slavery and segregation we never encounter that; our ancestors did. There are white people my age and younger who feel like there have to pay for what their ancestors did. I will never forget how one of my Facebook friends apologized for what her ancestors did; it was heartbreaking. No one should have to feel like they have to pay for a debt of someone else’s wrongdoings, ancestors or not.

It is time for our country to start healing together. All white people aren’t racist. All black people aren’t criminals. Healing cannot be done if salt continues to be applied to a wound. When we cut ourselves from a fall or a paper cut the body immediately begins the healing process. I have two sons and I want them to live in a world that is better than what’s going on now. Going into the past doesn’t solve anything if nothing positive is being done about it. Answering hate with hate does not solve anything. As the great Martin Luther King Jr. once said “Darkness cannot drive out darkness;only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

The Human Race

Bigotry doesn’t make any sense to me
What can I say
Other than I oppose hate
But answering hate with hate is a mistake
What can I say
What can I do
People get killed when
They protest peaceful
Let’s not forget
Heather Heyer bloodshed is not worth it
This wicked world needs more love
I follow my Heavenly Father
So with hate I do not bother
I pray
I refuse to add to the hate
Charlottesville Virginia
Boycotting the NFL
Not standing for the Star Spangled Banner
Black Lives Matter, Black Panthers,
KKK, skinheads and secret racists
All work together
At keeping the division going
Every last one of the people
In the groups I just named
Think that they are doing
What is right
If more people would search
For ways to minus the hate
Instead of reasons to keep it going
The world would be a better place
By understanding one another’s pain
By healing one another
By respecting one another
Sure let’s stand against racism
By standing with our
Brothers and sisters of all colors
Let’s band together like a rainbow
A single race can’t do it alone
Unity gets things done
So let’s love and live as one
One love
One race
The Human Race

Happy Father’s Day

It’s not easy being a single parent, it’s something that no-one signs up for. Parenting isn’t about just the easy stuff like picking something from out the refrigerator for the children to eat or taking them to the park. Parenting is about the hard stuff too like staying up all night when a child gets sick or for me helping your autistic son to understand what puberty is. Indeed, parenting can become a frustrating job at times and some mothers want to claim father’s day too.

Believe it or not there are a lot of excellent fathers who are in their children’s lives. Some fathers are still with the mothers of their children and are a positive entity. There are fathers who weathered the storm of the ups and downs in a relationship or marriage. There are also fathers who aren’t with the mothers of their children but his presence is still felt. There are fathers who don’t only see their children on holidays but often. There are fathers who take their children to school who knows their children favorite foods and colors. There are fathers who are making memories with their children not just making children who dream of seeing them. There are fathers who don’t just pay child support and feel that’s enough. There are fathers who put their children first and it stays that way regardless of whatever happens.

There are fathers who want to see their children but can’t. There are fathers who are single parents too. Is it really okay to rob the excellent fathers of their day because some of the mothers are in their feelings? Mothers day is in May. Father’s day is in June. Single parents day is in March we must understand the difference. Happy Father’s day to all of the great fathers around the world you are appreciated truly. Blessings!

Don’t Be A Fool Being A Bully Isn’t Cool

Today I read a very disturbing post an eleven year old girl committed suicide. The little girl was a victim of bullying. Even more heartbreaking about the story was who found her body it was her three year old sister. The little girl who committed suicide saw no way out except for taking her life. Bullies are a huge situation that should not be ignored. Children aren’t the only bullies adults can be too which is actually sadder. There are different types of bullying it’s important that we know what they are so we can spot them.

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Bullying affect people in negative ways it can push people to the point of no return. Children deserve to experience a happy life that’s bully free. I feel sorry for the bullies too hurt people hurt others. Many times bullies feel insecurities inside so they pick on other people. Bullies most times are bigger than their peers physically and have trouble at home.

Society really has things stacked up against parents with the internet, promotion of violence and disrespect of others it’s a lot for parents to monitor. I’m old schooled so the main thing I would tell another parents is to keep a open line of communication with your children. Pay attention to your children so you can notice if they are withdrawn, angry or sad remember children are very scared when it comes to a bullying situation. Parents should talk with their children’s teacher if they sense a problem. Teachers must report any problems to the principal or the dean most importantly inform the parents about everything.

I also touched on adults sometimes being bullies too because it’s the truth many of them use social media to publicly humiliate others. When it comes to adult bullies others should not back what they are doing causing them to stop. Bullies feed of the power off of having an audience and fear. Let’s make this clear one is a fool if they think being a bully is cool. If you are a bully who is an adult you are a even bigger fool… so grow up.

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Let’s pray for people who are being bullied and ask God to protect them from harm. Be a bully nor quietly observing mistreatment of another person is not cool. What if it was you? What would  you do? What would you want to see happen?

Seeing the Gold

The internet can be a crazy place. We see true stuff, fake news as Trump calls it and lots of added on stuff. The internet can be a world filled with gossip. Recently I wrote about reading a book called The Woman Code in it the author of the book ninth code was Do not gossip. The Bible talks about gossip a lot one doesn’t have to be a Christian to realize how badly gossip can affect a person’s life. I know that I don’t want to gossip or indulge in it either. I wouldn’t like to be lied on. Gossip causes a lot of damage most of it cannot be undone. Proverbs 16:28 A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends.

Let’s think about it what are some reasons why men and women gossip about a person or people? Let’s be honest most times gossip are lies. I mean why else would the person who’s spreading the gossip tell a person not to tell anyone? Why won’t the person who’s doing the gossiping tell the person whom they are gossiping about directly? Hmmmmm….sounds suspect to me and I’m not Lieutenant Columbo. “One more thing sir…”

Angry people use the internet to publicly humiliate others they are nothing more than keyboard gangsters who hides behind the screen…a bunch of trolls who belong under a bridge in some land far far away. Yeah I said it! They don’t have any facts but lots of lies. So if you talk behind a fool one will sound like one.

We all should know better than to take anything on the internet as facts. Right now I am taking a Statistic course. Last week I turned in an assignment and had points deducted from me because she said that  I needed to support my work with facts…..allow that to sink in. I have had people tell lies about me I knew why they were angry with me some still are. Once people stop talking to you they start talking about you. Our enemies are nothing more than estranged family members, formal associates,or formal friends. Think about it if a person is no longer speaking to another person anymore how true is their information. Example if a person is still gossiping about someone after a long period of time and have not been in contact with the person how accurate are their words? Why would a person continue to gossip about a someone whom they no longer speak to? Just something to think about.

I always try to be Christ like and try to put myself in other people’s shoes. If  I were to see something on the internet about someone  I would question the person who wrote it. Gossip is something that an angry person does so I would wonder why they are doing that. Not everything we read or find on the internet is true. Beyonce went to dinner last night now her photo has been made into a meme already no telling what they say. People make up memes, create rumors, and twist things around to cause division, turn people against each other,and fuel hate. People who gossip about someone else does it in hopes of hurting the people whom they are talking about and isolating them from others by attempting to turn people off from that person. As a Christian I pray for discernment I don’t want to share or spread lies about a person on social media otherwise I would have to question my character as well as why would  I want to put faith in angry words.

When we assassinate the character of others we inescapably annihilate our own in the process. We become no better than whatever we’re saying about another. The soul is better fed with words that speak life and hope.

I don’t know about anyone else but I’d rather be a peacemaker I don’t want to play a role in causing the flames of gossip to grow higher I rather put them out. Matthew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

My Name Is Gossip.
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning and malicious and gather strength with age.

The more I am quoted the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.
My victims are helpless.
They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.

To track me down is impossible.
The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I am nobody’s friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and ruin marriages.
I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartache and indigestion.
I spawn suspicion and generate grief.

I make innocent people cry in their pillows.
Even my name hisses.

I AM CALLED GOSSIP.

Father God help me to have control over my words and to see the gold in others.

Proverbs 11:27

27 He that diligently seeketh good procureth favour: but he that seeketh mischief, it shall come unto him.

A New Thing

I’m a creature of habit. I have always hated change up until recently anyway. Change is not always a bad thing it can be a good thing. The Bible spoke of doing a new thing in the Old Testament in Isaiah.

When God closes a door you best believe that He’s opening a new one. So whether you see a open door praise God anyway He always has our backs. The same God that made ways in the past still does it now and forever. It’s okay to move on and not look back God has something for us to look forward to. I believe this truly because He’s shown me so many times I’m not worried. Nothing will steal my joy there’s nothing or no-one more powerful than God. I can’t want to see everything that God has in store. So let go and let God.

Isaiah 43:18-19

18 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old.

19 Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.

Skeletons in Your Closet

My mother loved music one song that she used to play a lot was called Skeletons by Stevie Wonder. The beat to that song Skeletons was everything!! Anyway the lyrics went:

Skeletons in your closest

Itchin’ to come outside

Messin’ with your conscience

In a way your face can’t hide

Well you see where I am going with this. We all have skeletons in our closet still God has forgiven us. No one should be walking around with a heavy heart behind past events that God has already forgiven us for. Don’t allow anyone to make you feel guilty about your past because that isn’t cool. Especially when people don’t know you or your story. We have to get rid of people who are quick to judge and slow to love.

In my opinion when we can’t move on from past mistakes it robs us of our present. Our present is a gift. I don’t care how many bones a person has in their closet whether it’s enough to make a human skeleton or a dinosaur museum. Who are we to judge? A person of the world reminds a person of their past a real Christian knows better than to do that. Everyone has skeletons and everyone has a story that they don’t want to read aloud.

So don’t allow the devil, your guilt, your enemies, or anybody to make you feel guilty about what you and God has already worked out. Life is too short to worry about unpaid critics that feel that they have a right to judge your life. What did Jesus tell the woman who was caught in adultery? What did Jesus say to the Pharisees who was about to stone her? Alright enjoy the life that God has given you and be blessed!

2 Corinthians 5:17

17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

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