Don’t Come For Me

Today I had a black man tell me that myself and other black women who choose to swirl deserves to be placed into an oven alive so we can burn. I know what you are thinking Tameeka “why do you care about what a troll says?” I’ll tell you why because like I have already been saying there is a problem within the black community. It’s hard for me as well as some of the other single mothers who have black sons. Many of us are fighting to make sure that our sons will be respectable and productive citizens. I have already shared that I have always been attracted to white men however I did have two children with a black man. One day I will tell the whole story in a book because it’s worthy of that. I will say this while I love my sons very deeply I do wish that they was blessed to have another father however they would not be who they are without having the father that they have. The main thing that needs to be said is this don’t come for me unless you know my story and you heard it come from me directly. I am Not ashamed of my battle scars the war has been won that part of my life is done. I am at the point in my life that I don’t mind talking about what I have been through if it can help someone else.

My sons are by the same man who I married as well. The marriage did not work out it is what it is, getting married is one thing staying married is another. What is the most important thing that needs to be understood is that sometimes in order to avoid what Not to do you must understand why you should Not do it. I had my oldest in 2001 and my youngest in 2003 that was before Facebook, Twitter and You-Tube. Today there is a wealth of information available that can help the generations after me. Understand this I have never told any black woman to date a black man only. I always say date the person who loves and treats you the best regardless of his skin color because love has no color. There is nothing wrong with a woman wanting to have a family it just has to be done properly. If hurricane Harvey wasn’t an eye opener I am not sure what will there were way too many single black mothers who were totally alone. I am a advocate for breaking the chains of broken homes because they are the destroyer of children’s tomorrows. Every child deserves to be brought up in an intact home. I do Not want any child to walk around with a hole in their heart that was created by their parent. Children can be repaired unlike most adults this is why broken homes must cease be eradicated all together.

Back on topic I remember when I told my mother that I was attracted to white men at first she had a hard time accepting it. My mother told me that she was afraid of me being hurt but as I told her any man can hurt you. The support of interracial dating that is out now wasn’t around in the 80’s and 90’s. Support strengthens people to be brave enough to stand up for what they believe is right think about it civil rights didn’t happen with just Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. acts alone. As black women we must pull together and lift one another up not looked down on other women who messed up. I know that there are some disrespectful black men who are on a vendetta to try to destroy us but they can’t do that as long as we band together. I want to see all black women happy and successful don’t judge me by my past. To know me now is to learn my past so you may learn from it the struggles that I encountered yesterday made me the woman who I am today and I am not ashamed. Hurt people, hurt others and healed people, heal others please know that I am healed woman.

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The Human Race

Bigotry doesn’t make any sense to me
What can I say
Other than I oppose hate
But answering hate with hate is a mistake
What can I say
What can I do
People get killed when
They protest peaceful
Let’s not forget
Heather Heyer bloodshed is not worth it
This wicked world needs more love
I follow my Heavenly Father
So with hate I do not bother
I pray
I refuse to add to the hate
Charlottesville Virginia
Boycotting the NFL
Not standing for the Star Spangled Banner
Black Lives Matter, Black Panthers,
KKK, skinheads and secret racists
All work together
At keeping the division going
Every last one of the people
In the groups I just named
Think that they are doing
What is right
If more people would search
For ways to minus the hate
Instead of reasons to keep it going
The world would be a better place
By understanding one another’s pain
By healing one another
By respecting one another
Sure let’s stand against racism
By standing with our
Brothers and sisters of all colors
Let’s band together like a rainbow
A single race can’t do it alone
Unity gets things done
So let’s love and live as one
One love
One race
The Human Race

The “IBM”

So I was watching a very interesting video on YouTube it was about black men who don’t like it when black women swirl. Everyone knows where  I stand on this subject I believe that people should be able to explore their options in peace. It’s about numbers there are not enough black men for every black woman. I don’t know about the other black women but I am not waiting around or going on a scavenger hunt looking for an “IBM”. In case no one knows what IBM means it short for ideal black man. So what is an ideal black man he’s a leader, faithful, honest, loyal….I guess one can throw in his employment, doesn’t have a lot of children, is a great father to the children he does have, educated etc. What made the video interesting is that a black man suggested polygamy as a way to solve the number’s problem and noooooooooo. I don’t know any woman who values herself that would be willing to share a black man…..or any man period.

I don’t hate black men nor do I put them down. I do have a problem with the black men who put black women down. I do believe that black love exists however it’s not for me. I am into various things most of the things black men aren’t if so they are into white women plain and simple. Let’s be real honest for a second most black people have come from broken homes I came from one. I understand that for most people are unstable because they came from dysfunction okay when does it stop? I recognized my issues a long time ago and  I fixed them. Let me give an example when you hear a noise coming from your car don’t you go get it fixed? Okay if a person is broken they need to allow God to fixed them so they don’t go and damage someone else. Anyone who have emotional issues should not get involved with anyone their only pulling someone into their life storm. I’m pulling someone into my peace because life is too short to live any other way.

I guess the reason why  I wrote about this is because I can’t understand why interracial dating is such a huge problem. Growing up I had “One” crush on a black guy I have always been attracted to white men. Anyone who knows me personally know this and  I have dated white men too. Recently I decided that  I am going to do what makes me happy. If I am blessed to see 85 years old  I wanted to have a full life of happiness. The way to be happy is doing things as long as they are within God’s will that make us happy. The only person who we are suppose to live our lives for is God no one else. I pray that people find the one who makes them happy regardless of the person’s color.

Happy Birthday MLK

Happy Birthday to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Today is more than just a day off from work. I want to thank Dr. King for helping to make civil rights possible. I appreciate everything that  you have done and  I will never take it for granted. You fought to make your dream come true. Thank you for getting us to love one another in spite of our color.Yes we still have a longs to go because of people with their heart issues regardless I just want to thank you. I won’t complain instead  I will do my part to help enforce change in a positive way.

John 13:34 – A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

A Shade of Black

Tameeka is about to go there. Yes I am about to talk about colorism in the black community. I was watching a video on YouTube and it was about a website called Smoochr. The website is a place that allows people to filter the kind of people that they want. A person get to choose based on skin shade, size of lips, hair type etc. Hmmmmmm definitely not something that I will be checking out. As many know I’m about love and never about division. God made us all different but beautiful we are to embrace our differences not use them as a way to divide. Anyway I know some people may debate with me about who started colorism okay hundreds of years ago some of the white people did it fine and dandy. But who keeps the colorism going? The maker of the Smoochr website is a black man. So instead of pulling people together he’s is causing more separation and insecurities of others.

Colorism

I am black but my shade is brown. I’m what would be considered to be in between dark-skinned and light-skinned. Growing up I never paid attention to shade but I have witnessed dark-skinned people being bullied based on their color as if growing up wasn’t hard enough. It is still very much present today. I have also heard people of a dark skin talk about being insecure and hating their skin color. It’s just horrible and it needs to end. The only test that a paper bag should have is how much weight it can hold. At the end of the day we all check off the box for black regardless of our shade. I don’t care who slams me we must do better. Let’s lift up one another high. Stop hurting one another and let’s heal one another. I get the past but what are we doing now to move forward in a positive way. It’s the only way that change will happen.

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Interracial Dating

Everyone knows where I stand on love as far as I am concerned love has no color. Yes I am down with the swirl. Therefore I am I interested in dating white men and I’m ready to accept what comes with it. I have seen the backlash that black women get for talking about dating outside of their race. We are attacked constantly like doves during hunting  season. The number one thing that’s asked  besides their claims of self hate is”With so much that’s going on in the world why are you dicussing your love life.” To me why not with all the horrific things that’s going on let’s talk about some goodness and being in love is a fantastic thing. So let’s share the good news please shall we.

I love all kinds of music, poetry, so many different things most black men who share my interests are into white women and that’s true facts. I want to be with a man who I can be me and that’s okay. He embraces who I am completely not partly. Doesn’t make me feel like I am trying to be someone else when all that I am being is myself it’s something that I cannot help. There was a time years ago when I would hold back who I was because I was being a people pleaser well that’s no more. Life is too short to not be happy. In my life besides caring about what God thinks it’s about what and who makes me happy.