This Time of Year

I always get sad
Around this time of year
It’s when my mother
Left from here
Let me make myself clear
When it comes to
The death of a love one
You never heal
It’s impossible to get over
Losing someone who
You held so near, so dear
To your heart
There are always
Things that remind you
That they are gone
A picture, a memory, a song
Holidays, birthdays
Every time I reached
An important moment in my life
I would whisper
This is for you mom
I often wonder
How things would be like
If she was here
What advice would
She have given me
To help to endure hardships
She was so strong
She was so courageous
She was a leader
She was a blessing
She was my hero
Which is why all
I ever wanted to do
Was to make her happy
And to see her smile
It’s still impossible
For me to talk about her
Without holding back my tears
Bottled up feelings
Resides inside even though
I live my life
As best as I can
Even after twenty-one years this Saturday
It’s still feels as if
She passed yesterday
This is why I say
If you have lost
A special someone
Don’t allow anyone
To make you feel
As if the grief process has a limit
To heck with that
Never feel bad about
Mourning the one you love
Or for missing them
The pain is for life
Death of a love one
Will always hurt

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Happy Father’s Day

It’s not easy being a single parent, it’s something that no-one signs up for. Parenting isn’t about just the easy stuff like picking something from out the refrigerator for the children to eat or taking them to the park. Parenting is about the hard stuff too like staying up all night when a child gets sick or for me helping your autistic son to understand what puberty is. Indeed, parenting can become a frustrating job at times and some mothers want to claim father’s day too.

Believe it or not there are a lot of excellent fathers who are in their children’s lives. Some fathers are still with the mothers of their children and are a positive entity. There are fathers who weathered the storm of the ups and downs in a relationship or marriage. There are also fathers who aren’t with the mothers of their children but his presence is still felt. There are fathers who don’t only see their children on holidays but often. There are fathers who take their children to school who knows their children favorite foods and colors. There are fathers who are making memories with their children not just making children who dream of seeing them. There are fathers who don’t just pay child support and feel that’s enough. There are fathers who put their children first and it stays that way regardless of whatever happens.

There are fathers who want to see their children but can’t. There are fathers who are single parents too. Is it really okay to rob the excellent fathers of their day because some of the mothers are in their feelings? Mothers day is in May. Father’s day is in June. Single parents day is in March we must understand the difference. Happy Father’s day to all of the great fathers around the world you are appreciated truly. Blessings!

Missing You Always

Some days are harder than others

Birthdays, holidays, a child’s birth

Wondering how it would be

If you were here with us

I really wish that you

Were on Earth

February 2nd is your birthday

February 3rd 1997 is the day and year

That  you left from here

So many things have taken place

Both good and bad

No matter what

I miss seeing your face

It’s 2017

20 years have gone by

Even now  I still cry

Memories help me to keep going

Like the circus blizzard of March 1980

5 months pregnant

Walking in the snow to

Come to get me off of the school bus

Millions of reasons why you have

And will always will be my hero

Hoping and praying that  I am able

To be at least a fraction of

A person that  you were

I miss you

Not just on Mother’s Day

Not just on Thanksgiving Day

Not just on Christmas Day

But every single day

There will always be

A huge hole in my heart

A band aid nor a first aid kit

Can fix the damage

It’s still hard to manage

Jesus has been my fence

Helping me with the healing

I feel so blue

Everyday that I live

I miss  you mom

You instilled in me

So many things

That are very helpful

Right to this very day

Which have been blessings

I won’t deny my feelings

I am human

I don’t know every answer

I don’t always understand

All  I know is everything

Works as part of God’s plan

Including those He chooses

To call home to Heaven

I continue to trust Him

Grateful for the time

We did spend

Thankful that you raised me

To know God Almighty

Because of that  I believe and know

That  I will see you again

Mom I miss you and  I love you

 

Matthew 5:4

 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

 

Single Parenting It Isn’t A Joke

It’s not a white thing or a black thing being a single parent can be hard.We all come from a family which is suppose to be a beautiful thing. Unfortunately things happen and what we felt was destined sometimes falls apart. Many times a family split can become ugly. What really makes me think and I try really hard to not allow it to get to me is how can something that was once so happy become the opposite?

When a family experience a split it’s really hard on the children. As far as I’m concerned regardless of how I feel about my children’s dad I don’t allow it to affect them my feelings ended when we did. My children are my top priority their happiness is all that I care about. Every time I look at my boys it’s with the look of when they were first born so much love. I will give any and everything for my children to be okay. That’s why they don’t see tension between their father and I it’s not for them to be involved in adult situations.

Growing up my mother never discussed her feelings with me pertaining to my father unless I asked her getting an answer out of her was like abstracting a tooth from a tiger. She didn’t want to feel like she was influencing my decision about my father. My mother was an amazing mother all of my parenting skills comes from her.

Anyway back on top it doesn’t matter how we feel or where we are. The children takes priority they should never go neglected. They should never be used as pawns between a mother and father. At times everyone has advice to give about single parenting still each case is different but both parents must care about the children’s well being. When we bring children into the world our lives change and so does their too which should be for the better even if a relationship or marriage turns out bad.