Masculinity

So the other day I was watching a reaction video for Type O Negative. The young lady spoke of how she had not seen masculinity like Peter Steele ever! I was thinking to myself, “What kind of men has she seen?” Not just her, I have seen other comments too. One video by Type O Negative called “Love You to Death a person assumed that Peter had self-esteem issues because of his lyrics. In the song “Love You to Death, Pete asked, “Am I good enough for you?”

First off, Peter Steele could have had any woman that he wanted. Peter Steele was a different kind of man. When I think of the lyrics asking, “Am I good enough for you?”Perhaps he understood a woman’s worth!!! Which is something that certain men could be less about if at all?

I feel that today’s world is so sad. Masculinity to me isn’t about a man’s physique; it’s about a man standing up in his manhood without fear. A strong man makes responsible decisions and knows how to make a woman feel safe. All women want to feel safe.

Once an honest opinion is verbalized, it seems like the whole world comes to an end. As a black woman, I feel that being dishonest is doing a disservice to those who need to hear the truth. I’m not going to lie about what some black men should be doing. We have been taking on many things for far too long only to be told that we have attitudes, harsh, and not feminine. I would love to be carefree like Dorothy of the Wizard of Oz. Unfortunately, I can’t.

Young ladies of this generation needs to see more men like Peter Steele and not feel that they are extinct!!!

I Just Don’t Know How to Feel

I feel like the U2 song called Numb
I have a bland demeanor
I just don’t know how to feel
I wrote a post
The other day
Was it God preparing me
I spoke about
The importance of being healthy
Then boom one of my sisters
That is second to me in my family
Became sickly
My sister and I
Have very different personalities
We are not any different
Than any other siblings
She would push me
To the point where
I would scream
Then things would really get ugly
The next thing you know
We stop speaking
To each other
This last time was unique
Because when I spoke
Back to my sister
She had a surgery
That changed everything
It brought on an
Illness that made her so weak
That it robbed
Her of her speech and mobility
My sister told me
That she had a vision
Of all of her sisters
When we were young
In the backyard playing
Then she gave me an apology
She said I’m sorry
That I have been so mean
I love you with all of my heart
Then she started crying
And asked God
Why are You punishing me?
I think about Christianity
Christians are still
Human beings
Is it right
For us to except
People being mean?
I always try
To be forgiving
I feel so torn
Do I stand up
And demand respect
For all the times
She made me upset
Or do I allow
This situation to teach me
To not waste time
On stupid things
Because time is the most
Valuable thing that you can
Share with someone
That you love deeply
I love my sisters
So much I just
Want us to live to be elderly
I just want us to live carefree
I just want us to be happy
Father God in Heaven
Please allow my prayers
To be
My heart can’t take
Anymore agony

Eyes Wide Open

I’ve been so meaning to write about this for over a week now. I am not into celebrity news, but I have written about Ciara a couple of times. Ciara changed her choice of men and found her king. Yes. He is a king because he serves God almighty.

In the past, Ciara dated rappers Future and Slim Thug. Recently Slim Thug accused Ciara of marrying the Seahawk’s quarterback Russell Wilson for financial stability. Which goes right back to my post from yesterday about how some black men waste good years on things that don’t matter. Slim Thug further went on to call Russell Wilson “corny.” To guys like Slim Thug being a Christian, a one woman’s man and responsible is corny. This proves what I have been saying all along about the shortage of quality black men.

Slim Thug also said that women who date bad boys couldn’t date good guys. How much sense does that make? Remember the saying about kissing toads until finding a prince, making wrong turns before making the right one or experience is the best teacher. We are not our past; some people refuse to allow people to be happy. Another thing what are bad boys about? So because they don’t want to change the women who date them doesn’t deserve better? Is he saying that bad guys aren’t about anything or that they can’t change? Many questions can come from what Slim Thug is saying, and they aren’t good ones. Words are like a boomerang when you throw them at others; they come back.

As we get older we realize what’s important and what’s not. Sadly some people never get it and they never mature. I love Ciara response to all of her haters and butt hurt exes:
Screenshot_2018-08-04-15-05-23-1

Being cool isn’t having children all over the place that are not receiving hands-on parenting, sleeping around, or hanging out in the streets wasting time.

Some people don’t want to change for the better and get jealous of the people who do. These same people will attempt to instill fear into others or destroy their happiness. They have wasted so much time until they don’t have a enough to make up for what’s lost. Life is too short to be in struggle love or poverty. There is more to life, and it isn’t just heartbreak or paying for poor choices. When we learn from our mistakes, our growth is our reward, and we reap a harvest that is plentiful. The people who don’t want to learn this life lesson are just plain pitiful.
Screenshot_2018-08-04-15-05-40-1

Racist Boyfriend?

Yesterday was a crazy day for me. On Facebook, I’m in a couple of swirl groups. I swear the people who allow people into the groups should make sure that they are screened more thoroughly. I think that some are black men hiding behind a fake profile picture.

There was a question asked in the group. The question was, can a white man date a black woman and be racist? Here we go going through the same thing. Here we go again!

It’s always someone who is trying to scare black women from being open-minded about who she wants to date. The question opened up a sea of emotions. This person caused hysteria with this one question it opened up all kinds of what ifs. Some of the women started to speak of some white men possibly having fetishes but that doesn’t bother me here’s why:
fet·ish
ˈfediSH/Submit
noun
1.
A form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc.
“Victorian men developed fetishes focusing on feet, shoes, and boots.”

Most black men love black women’s butts!!!! Trust me on this; I’m just saying.

The question made some of the white men in the group feel uncomfortable, and I didn’t blame them. It had some people questioning white men’s motives for dating black women — just a bunch of foolishness. We should be allowed to date who we choose without people trying to destroy it, and it was a black woman doing it.

Some black men have wasted years that should have been spent on developing a career or getting a degree and instead have accumulated baggage like children with different women, out of wedlock, of course. The 77% out of wedlock birth rate proves this. Let’s not get me started on the IBM they aren’t marrying anyone, but they are open to multiple women trying out for a position that they aren’t thinking about. The fact is there is a shortage of quality black men, and the solution is to date out.

We can’t live in fear of what could happen. Are there racist white men that a black woman could come across? Sure. Just like a black woman could come across a black man who’s abusive, disrespectful, and a cheater. The chances of a racist white guy dating a black woman are slim to none. That’s facts.

Look every time we take a chance at love there is a possibility that a bad thing could happen and good things can happen too. Still, good things can’t happen if we aren’t open to the opportunity! The right man for us may not look like what we expect. Expectations and assumptions only help us to miss out because they are always wrong. I refuse to live in fear. If there is a black woman, who fears dating white men because of the chance that they may be racist, there is an excellent solution for that don’t swirl. It’s just that simple.

Your Best You

What works for us may not work for someone else however we need to make sure that we don’t hold ourselves back.

Yesterday I saw so many things that had me thinking about how some people aren’t ready to give themselves the best. We have to stay away from people who deprive themselves and want starve us of our dreams as well.

Most of my life I have had a battle with my weight. Recently I started the Keto Diet and I have been making excellent progress. I’ve lost tons of weight several times in my life so I know the struggle. Anyway I put a picture on Facebook of myself and seconds later I saw a post in my Newsfeed pertaining to Christians who are vain. I hardly ever upload pictures but this lady is overweight. She may attempt to call me vain but she may have a problem with jealousy.

It is said that a picture speaks a thousand words well I beg to differ. My picture is of a woman who has had a battle with weight and a mother who had the battle as well. My mother died of cancer in 1997 and she was overweight. The doctors told me that if my mother had of been slimmer they could have helped her to live longer. The fact is our health is our wealth. We can’t do anything without having good health.

I remember when a lady on YouTube spoke of black women getting their health together and some women got upset but she was right!! In the black community black men tell black women to stay thick the problem is what people think is thick. Newflash thick isn’t obesity. Obesity is the leading cause of certain illnesses like diabetes and high blood pressure.

We should be our best selves. When we are at our best the best harvest is received. Healthy people most times live longer.

I’ve come to realize that most times people aren’t ready to hear the truth even if it’s something that can help them too. Why wouldn’t we want to be the best us?

I remember watching old contestants from world biggest losers and they shared how their perfect weight wasn’t always the recommended weight. They were healthy at a weight that was best for them.

Over the years we have heard about being comfortable with ourselves and that’s a great mindset as long as we are healthy.

I have acid reflux and when I’m overweight I pay for it dearly. I would never put a person down about their weight. I’ve been slim and overweight so I understand the struggle. I only want to inspire and uplifted others. Our lives are not just our own. I have two sons depending on me and I want to be here for them.

Yes! I’m a Christian and we believe that our bodies are temporary however we still need to be healthy. We take care of our houses and cars. Why not our bodies as well?

Type O Negative

Hey Everyone! What’s up?! This is my first what’s Tameeka listening to for the month of August. I’m super excited.

The 90s holds so many memories for me. On Saturday nights I would stay up late just to watch Headbanger’s Ball. My mother would buy blank VHS tapes so I could record Headbanger’s Ball.

The year was 1994 when Riki Rachtman interviewed Peter Steele and Josh Silver. I was glued to the television screen. The song Christian woman was one of Type O Negative’s biggest hits. Peter Steele was a very intelligent guy he wrote all the songs for the band. Josh Silver was always cool as a cucumber with a sarcastic demeanor. The interview had one funny moment when Riki talked about the lyrics like Peter had a problem with women. Peter was like “I wrote a song about one woman that I was upset with. Anyone who understands basic English should know the difference between singular and plural.” Type O Negative was the absolute best. The 90s was when the band’s popularity was at it’s peak.

I love Type O Negative so much. Yeah! Please know that black girls indeed rock even back in the day I appreciated all music.

Type O Negative’s music is what I am listening to today as I bang my head walking down memory lane.

Just a Thought

I have been meaning to post about this days ago. It’s about Nia Wilson she was killed because of a random act. Everywhere on Facebook it’s hashtag justice for Nia Wilson. I would like to say that I have her family in my prayers.

I find some of the people of my race comical. I read a post by a black man that said:
Dear White Men,
“In my presence Do Not And I Repeat Do Not Disrespect, Touch, Cuss, Do Anything To Harm My Black Women!”
Is this brother serious? I have seen him tell black women when they complain about black men to “choose better.” This is the kind of stuff that I am talking about!!! I can’t and don’t take some of these black men seriously. The hypocrisy is unreal! I see it every day.

What I am about to write could piss people off but it’s my opinion which I am entitled to. There is a video that I saw and the lady made a lot of sense. She spoke of how when she researched further about the Nia Wilson’s story that she found other stories that no one was talking about.

I’ll tell you the reason why the Nia Wilson story is talked about and not the others for the same reason why Rosa Parks was talked about and Claudette Colvin wasn’t. Or the Lovings and not Elinor Powell. The black community pick and choose the stories that they want to get outraged about. Some black people look at looks, prestige, and skin color as important and blame the white race. If you don’t believe me read Claudette Colvin’s story.

The moment that some black people see a situation with a white person they scream racism. It’s not always about race. I’m so sorry about Nia Wilson but the fact is more black women die by the hands of black men. There are more violent black on black crimes than black people being killed by another race. Murder is never right by anyone’s hands just like it’s not right to make up excuses about black on black crime. Where is the outrage about domestic violence? Where is the outrage when an innocent child is killed during a drive by? Where is the outrage about gang violence?

I wrote a post about this a few days ago all of my life I have embraced who I am. I have never followed the trend but did what made me happy. The point is some black people in the community pick and choose what to get outraged out as well as who to embrace. I have been mistreated by people who share my skin color however that’s a post for another day.

All life is precious and no one has the right to cut someone else’s short I don’t care what race the person is.

I Am Free

I’m not for racism
You are cooning
I’m a Christian
You are stupid
That’s a white man’s religion
I want to work with every race
You are working with the enemy
I’m opening up my dating options
You are a bed wench
I enjoy the freedom of wearing wigs
You are wearing someone’s hair
Because you can’t grow your own
I have friends of every race
You are an Oreo
I have dreams of better things
You are still black
I am feminine
You are weak
I am educated
You are not that smart
I am valuable
You are worthless
I have standards
You are not all of that
I am leaving the hood
You are not going anywhere
I don’t like what’s going on
Within the black community
You are self-hating
I am living my best life
You are a sellout
I love my brown skin
You are too dark
I love my natural hair
You are nappy headed
I love heavy metal
You are trying to be something
That you are not
I’m happy with my size
You are fat
I enjoy living the single life
You are a thot
I enjoy being alone
You are a liar no one wants you
I love me some me
I love you too Boo
How could you?
All of these negative words
Came for you
If you love me
You sure do have a funny way
Of showing it
Well I am free
And I no longer
Care about you attempting
To degrade me
What you believe
Only elevates me
As I strive to be
The opposite
Of what you would
Like to see for me
Misery loves company
But you can’t
Stop me from being happy
You don’t control
My destiny

STP

You can always tell a person who knows what they are talking about when it comes to music. It’s like a girl trying to act like she knows the game of football in order to impress a guy. Yet she doesn’t know what QB or CB stands for! You get what I mean!

When I say STP I don’t mean the motor oil company but the band. STP stands for Stone Temple Pilots.

In 1992, I remember watching MTV and the video for Plush came on, I fell in love. Immediately I asked my mother if she could get me STP’s cassette Core and she did. I’ve been a hardcore fan from day one.

STP’s song Big Empty was featured on the movie soundtrack for The Crow. The Crow soundtrack was absolutely amazing I love every song on it.

It was so heartbreaking when I learned of Scott Weiland’s passing on December 3, 2015. Scott was the lead singer of STP, his voice was incredible. If you don’t believe me about how great Scott’s voice was listen for yourself. Many artist from when I was growing up have passed away it’s so sad, time is so precious.

I wanted to share my top ten favorite STP songs:

10. Sour Girl
9. Creep
8. Interstate Love Song
7. Big Empty
6. Sex Type Thing
5. Wicked Garden
4. Vasoline
3. Big Bang Baby
2. Trippin’ On A Hole In A Paper Heart
1. Plush