Autumn 2018

Autumn is my favorite season. I love the colored leaves, candy corn, and pumpkin spiced coffee!

When I was young once the month of September would roll around I got excited because it wouldn’t be too much longer before Autumn would begin.

Growing up my house had a big back and front yard. My mother would say “Tameeka grab some garbage bags and rake the yard.” I didn’t enjoy raking up all the leaves that fell though. One Autumn a hurricane came and knocked the tree down that dropped all the leaves in the yard. No one was hurt but I was thankful that the tree was gone because I didn’t have to rake leaves anymore!

This year Autumn begins on September 22th. I am super ecstatic!

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September Sun

It’s no secret how much that I love Type O Negative. The 90s rocked and Type O Negative made it happen. I was debating which song I wanted to share it was a tie between Love You to Death and September Sun. Well it’s September so it’s obvious which song won. Check out the lyrics:

September Sun
Type O Negative
The album’s second single, which was cut down from over nine minutes to under five for radio.
September sun, glowing golden hair
Now keep in mind, son: she was never there
October’s rust bisecting black storm clouds
Only the deaf hear my silent shouts

Yet in the dark, still he screams your name (Elizabeth!)
Nights living death with witch rhymes insane
Ten years amassed, para toda mi vida?
Lost man in time; was his name Peter?

September sun, rotted Flatbush porch
I would have run then, had I known the cost
Autumnal rays turned your eyes to stone
Did it give you pleasure to steal my soul?

Yet in the dark, still he screams your name (Elizabeth!)
Nights living death with witch rhymes insane
Ten years amassed, para toda mi vida?
Lost man in time; was his name Peter?

Leave her alone
I said leave her alone

Me? I know why

Compromising for Love

Hey Everyone! How’s it going? I officially have two courses left and I will have my bachelor’s degree. Yippie!

Now that I have gotten that out of the way. The other day I watched a video that was cool and it made me think. The person in the video spoke of how when it came to interracial dating one of his biggest turn offs is people picking a partner based on their skin color.

I left a comment on the video, here’s what I wrote:
Screenshot_2018-08-23-09-03-23-1

When it comes to seeking a person to be in a committed relationship our interests are important. I love all music however heavy metal is my favorite. I’m a Dallas Cowboys fan!! Having common interests helps us to connect with others. Our interests makes us who we are. Should we compromise who we are for love? So I had a response on my post that said:
Screenshot_2018-08-23-09-03-45-1

To me the right partner for me will genuinely accept me for who I am without trying to change me into someone that they want me to be. Otherwise the person should be with a completely different person and not me. I have shared my thoughts on interracial dating. When I come across a black man who share my interests they are into white women. And that’s okay. Is there something wrong with being attracted to a certain kind of person?

I made a promise to myself a few years ago that I wouldn’t compromise who I am anymore. I refuse to be someone that I’m not. When we are who we are the right people will connect with us. Everything in my life at this point that I do is important to me right down to my coffee. I’m not sure how true it is but eharmony looks for true compatibility in order to help people find the perfect match. They ask people to be completely honest. We become deprived when we aren’t being ourselves 100 percent. Life is just too short for that. My biggest fear is living to be 80 or 90 years old with a life that filled with more regret than satisfaction or happiness because of my choices. Many times our choices can make huge impact on our lives it’s too much to gamble.

I have said this before compromise should happen once we have found the right one not when we are searching for them. We can’t be with the right one if we are with the wrong one.

I Just Don’t Know How to Feel

I feel like the U2 song called Numb
I have a bland demeanor
I just don’t know how to feel
I wrote a post
The other day
Was it God preparing me
I spoke about
The importance of being healthy
Then boom one of my sisters
That is second to me in my family
Became sickly
My sister and I
Have very different personalities
We are not any different
Than any other siblings
She would push me
To the point where
I would scream
Then things would really get ugly
The next thing you know
We stop speaking
To each other
This last time was unique
Because when I spoke
Back to my sister
She had a surgery
That changed everything
It brought on an
Illness that made her so weak
That it robbed
Her of her speech and mobility
My sister told me
That she had a vision
Of all of her sisters
When we were young
In the backyard playing
Then she gave me an apology
She said I’m sorry
That I have been so mean
I love you with all of my heart
Then she started crying
And asked God
Why are You punishing me?
I think about Christianity
Christians are still
Human beings
Is it right
For us to except
People being mean?
I always try
To be forgiving
I feel so torn
Do I stand up
And demand respect
For all the times
She made me upset
Or do I allow
This situation to teach me
To not waste time
On stupid things
Because time is the most
Valuable thing that you can
Share with someone
That you love deeply
I love my sisters
So much I just
Want us to live to be elderly
I just want us to live carefree
I just want us to be happy
Father God in Heaven
Please allow my prayers
To be
My heart can’t take
Anymore agony

Type O Negative

Hey Everyone! What’s up?! This is my first what’s Tameeka listening to for the month of August. I’m super excited.

The 90s holds so many memories for me. On Saturday nights I would stay up late just to watch Headbanger’s Ball. My mother would buy blank VHS tapes so I could record Headbanger’s Ball.

The year was 1994 when Riki Rachtman interviewed Peter Steele and Josh Silver. I was glued to the television screen. The song Christian woman was one of Type O Negative’s biggest hits. Peter Steele was a very intelligent guy he wrote all the songs for the band. Josh Silver was always cool as a cucumber with a sarcastic demeanor. The interview had one funny moment when Riki talked about the lyrics like Peter had a problem with women. Peter was like “I wrote a song about one woman that I was upset with. Anyone who understands basic English should know the difference between singular and plural.” Type O Negative was the absolute best. The 90s was when the band’s popularity was at it’s peak.

I love Type O Negative so much. Yeah! Please know that black girls indeed rock even back in the day I appreciated all music.

Type O Negative’s music is what I am listening to today as I bang my head walking down memory lane.

Just a Thought

I have been meaning to post about this days ago. It’s about Nia Wilson she was killed because of a random act. Everywhere on Facebook it’s hashtag justice for Nia Wilson. I would like to say that I have her family in my prayers.

I find some of the people of my race comical. I read a post by a black man that said:
Dear White Men,
“In my presence Do Not And I Repeat Do Not Disrespect, Touch, Cuss, Do Anything To Harm My Black Women!”
Is this brother serious? I have seen him tell black women when they complain about black men to “choose better.” This is the kind of stuff that I am talking about!!! I can’t and don’t take some of these black men seriously. The hypocrisy is unreal! I see it every day.

What I am about to write could piss people off but it’s my opinion which I am entitled to. There is a video that I saw and the lady made a lot of sense. She spoke of how when she researched further about the Nia Wilson’s story that she found other stories that no one was talking about.

I’ll tell you the reason why the Nia Wilson story is talked about and not the others for the same reason why Rosa Parks was talked about and Claudette Colvin wasn’t. Or the Lovings and not Elinor Powell. The black community pick and choose the stories that they want to get outraged about. Some black people look at looks, prestige, and skin color as important and blame the white race. If you don’t believe me read Claudette Colvin’s story.

The moment that some black people see a situation with a white person they scream racism. It’s not always about race. I’m so sorry about Nia Wilson but the fact is more black women die by the hands of black men. There are more violent black on black crimes than black people being killed by another race. Murder is never right by anyone’s hands just like it’s not right to make up excuses about black on black crime. Where is the outrage about domestic violence? Where is the outrage when an innocent child is killed during a drive by? Where is the outrage about gang violence?

I wrote a post about this a few days ago all of my life I have embraced who I am. I have never followed the trend but did what made me happy. The point is some black people in the community pick and choose what to get outraged out as well as who to embrace. I have been mistreated by people who share my skin color however that’s a post for another day.

All life is precious and no one has the right to cut someone else’s short I don’t care what race the person is.