Talking

He’s My Baby Daddy

I wanted to hurry up and post this before father’s day because I don’t want to ruin the day with this news. Unless you have been living under a rock, then you may have heard about the baby daddy greeting card Target drama. Yes, I call it drama because the situation is totally unnecessary. I don’t understand some of the people of my race. How come it’s okay for some of us to come up with words or be able to say certain words to one another but the minute a white person says it they are racist? Yeah, I said it. For instance, the “n” word is a very offensive word, but some black people call one another that. Now stay with me. I’m about to make a huge point.

I recently took a class, and the subject came up about what is acceptable language socially. Long story short it was agreed upon that if it’s not acceptable socially, then it should not be expressed verbally publicly. Still, what is offensive? I have never liked the phrase “baby daddy.” I would cringe when I would hear some females say, “oh, he’s just my baby, daddy.” There is nothing cool about having a baby daddy or for some mothers, baby daddies. This phrase was supposed to be the new in words like “fleek” a word that I wish would go far away!!!
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Some classes were being taught in school about Ebonics. It was shown so that other races of people could understand the blending of words ebony, aka black and phonics sounds. The Britannica describes it as “a form of American English used in the home or for day-to-day communication rather than for formal occasions.” The Merriam-Webster refers to “baby daddy” as slang.

The Urban Dictionary defines “baby daddy” as a father of a woman’s child that she is not involved with” The sentence used to explain the meaning of the words went something like this “Who is that? “Girl two.” That’s my dumb baby daddy”. So if this word is in the urban dictionary and it’s being used in heavy rotation, what’s the big deal about the “baby daddy” greeting card?

Target is a retail department store that was trying to “target” or appeal to the people who uses this phrase. I feel that it’s beyond ridiculous that they had to apologize for a greeting card. The greeting card was sighted as being “racially insensitive.” How is a greeting card with “baby daddy” in it being racially insensitive? It was a phrase invented by a person or people of the black race. For goodness, sakes. How is a “baby daddy” card racist? I wonder what the race of the person who made the card was? And what kind of father’s day cards would mothers who aren’t involved with their children’s fathers deem to be appropriate? I guarantee that many of them refer to their children’s fathers as their “baby daddy.” Frankly, I just don’t get it. Here’s what was inside of the greeting card:
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I could be wrong, but I think that when something sheds light on the bad things that are usually celebrated within the black community that should not be. The reality of dysfunction becomes real then all of a sudden it comes off as being “racist” because the dysfunction of what is going on in the black community is being exposed even if it’s done unintentionally. Getting all up in an uproar behind a greeting card shows that the truth hurts.

Writing What Matters to Me

I once heard a person say that “a writer writes something every day”. Hmmmm, I am not so sure about that. It’s quality over quantity always. When I first started my blogging journey I wrote like I was writing in a diary really, really relaxed. The subjects that I shared were always interesting but I had to become more aware of my grammar. Overall, I am proud of my blog. I wanted to do something that had lots of interesting things. Having mind blowing posts that sticks leaving a lasting impression. That’s what I am aiming for. I believe also that I should do things that makes me feel that I am being true to myself. If not, why should I blog at all?

Growing up I always loved writing especially poems. I have been writing poems every since I was a teenager. Blogging allows me to dive into others things that are important to me as well. As I have said there is only but so much that I can say on Facebook without someone not feeling what I am saying.

I will do whatever it takes to keep my blog going. Since I am so passionate about what I write I refuse to fold when it comes to my blog. The things that I talk about needs to be said I am not about saying things so that it goes over people’s heads. Nope, nope, and nope.

Don’t Be A Fool Being A Bully Isn’t Cool

Today I read a very disturbing post an eleven year old girl committed suicide. The little girl was a victim of bullying. Even more heartbreaking about the story was who found her body it was her three year old sister. The little girl who committed suicide saw no way out except for taking her life. Bullies are a huge situation that should not be ignored. Children aren’t the only bullies adults can be too which is actually sadder. There are different types of bullying it’s important that we know what they are so we can spot them.

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Bullying affect people in negative ways it can push people to the point of no return. Children deserve to experience a happy life that’s bully free. I feel sorry for the bullies too hurt people hurt others. Many times bullies feel insecurities inside so they pick on other people. Bullies most times are bigger than their peers physically and have trouble at home.

Society really has things stacked up against parents with the internet, promotion of violence and disrespect of others it’s a lot for parents to monitor. I’m old schooled so the main thing I would tell another parents is to keep a open line of communication with your children. Pay attention to your children so you can notice if they are withdrawn, angry or sad remember children are very scared when it comes to a bullying situation. Parents should talk with their children’s teacher if they sense a problem. Teachers must report any problems to the principal or the dean most importantly inform the parents about everything.

I also touched on adults sometimes being bullies too because it’s the truth many of them use social media to publicly humiliate others. When it comes to adult bullies others should not back what they are doing causing them to stop. Bullies feed of the power off of having an audience and fear. Let’s make this clear one is a fool if they think being a bully is cool. If you are a bully who is an adult you are a even bigger fool… so grow up.

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Let’s pray for people who are being bullied and ask God to protect them from harm. Be a bully nor quietly observing mistreatment of another person is not cool. What if it was you? What would  you do? What would you want to see happen?

Seeing the Gold

The internet can be a crazy place. We see true stuff, fake news as Trump calls it and lots of added on stuff. The internet can be a world filled with gossip. Recently I wrote about reading a book called The Woman Code in it the author of the book ninth code was Do not gossip. The Bible talks about gossip a lot one doesn’t have to be a Christian to realize how badly gossip can affect a person’s life. I know that I don’t want to gossip or indulge in it either. I wouldn’t like to be lied on. Gossip causes a lot of damage most of it cannot be undone. Proverbs 16:28 A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends.

Let’s think about it what are some reasons why men and women gossip about a person or people? Let’s be honest most times gossip are lies. I mean why else would the person who’s spreading the gossip tell a person not to tell anyone? Why won’t the person who’s doing the gossiping tell the person whom they are gossiping about directly? Hmmmmm….sounds suspect to me and I’m not Lieutenant Columbo. “One more thing sir…”

Angry people use the internet to publicly humiliate others they are nothing more than keyboard gangsters who hides behind the screen…a bunch of trolls who belong under a bridge in some land far far away. Yeah I said it! They don’t have any facts but lots of lies. So if you talk behind a fool one will sound like one.

We all should know better than to take anything on the internet as facts. Right now I am taking a Statistic course. Last week I turned in an assignment and had points deducted from me because she said that  I needed to support my work with facts…..allow that to sink in. I have had people tell lies about me I knew why they were angry with me some still are. Once people stop talking to you they start talking about you. Our enemies are nothing more than estranged family members, formal associates,or formal friends. Think about it if a person is no longer speaking to another person anymore how true is their information. Example if a person is still gossiping about someone after a long period of time and have not been in contact with the person how accurate are their words? Why would a person continue to gossip about a someone whom they no longer speak to? Just something to think about.

I always try to be Christ like and try to put myself in other people’s shoes. If  I were to see something on the internet about someone  I would question the person who wrote it. Gossip is something that an angry person does so I would wonder why they are doing that. Not everything we read or find on the internet is true. Beyonce went to dinner last night now her photo has been made into a meme already no telling what they say. People make up memes, create rumors, and twist things around to cause division, turn people against each other,and fuel hate. People who gossip about someone else does it in hopes of hurting the people whom they are talking about and isolating them from others by attempting to turn people off from that person. As a Christian I pray for discernment I don’t want to share or spread lies about a person on social media otherwise I would have to question my character as well as why would  I want to put faith in angry words.

When we assassinate the character of others we inescapably annihilate our own in the process. We become no better than whatever we’re saying about another. The soul is better fed with words that speak life and hope.

I don’t know about anyone else but I’d rather be a peacemaker I don’t want to play a role in causing the flames of gossip to grow higher I rather put them out. Matthew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

My Name Is Gossip.
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning and malicious and gather strength with age.

The more I am quoted the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.
My victims are helpless.
They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.

To track me down is impossible.
The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I am nobody’s friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and ruin marriages.
I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartache and indigestion.
I spawn suspicion and generate grief.

I make innocent people cry in their pillows.
Even my name hisses.

I AM CALLED GOSSIP.

Father God help me to have control over my words and to see the gold in others.

Proverbs 11:27

27 He that diligently seeketh good procureth favour: but he that seeketh mischief, it shall come unto him.

What’s Tameeka Listening To?

I’ve been on a Daryl Hall kick for a few days. Daryl Hall is one half of the music duo Hall and Oates. I have been fans of Hall and Oates for years one of my favorite songs by them is Say It Isn’t So. Recently I have been listening to his solo album called Soul Alone. One of my favorite songs by Daryl Hall is Stop Loving Me, Stop Loving You. Daryl Hall used Marvin Gaye’s song When did you stop loving me, When did I stop loving you song as a template for his song. Check it out:

Being A Great Dad

Growing up in a broken home

Taught me that parenting

Should not be done alone

Indeed we have our heavenly Father

He also gives us rules to follow

That we all should honor

A mother is to nurture her children

Instill compassion in her children

Teach them brilliant cooking skills

A mother plants amazing feelings

Into her children so that they take root

A father gives his children advice

Teaches his children how to ride a bike

Teaches his children how to drive

How a man treats a lady

He leads by example

He’s his children protector whether

Or not he and the mother are together

A mother’s and a father’s love for

Their children should always be equal

Too many are trying to minimize

A father’s unique contributions

As if it means nothing at all

These kinds of attitudes are part

Of the black community’s problem

I know men who are good fathers

Who have had the worse life experiences

I’m talking horrendous

Yet they don’t use them as crutches

Are there petty mothers

Who for no good reasons stops

The children’s fathers from having

A relationship with their kids

Yes and those situations I don’t accept

But let’s be honest those kinds of

Situations are rare

How about the fathers who makes

The choice to neglect

Having a relationship with their children

Those kind of fathers

Don’t deserve any respect

Once  a person becomes a parent

A mission must be made to make sure

That their children have

The absolute best

A parent’s love should always be felt

Even when they aren’t present

Children should never ever feel

As if they never received enough love

There’s nothing that hurts worse

Then to feel rejected by

Your very own parent

Why should a child have to learn

How to become immune to hurt

It’s the same old tune

We are living in a society

With people who are self absorbed

Classic narcissistic behavior

Some of these fathers who aren’t good

Align themselves with

A bunch of yes men

Ones who agree with everything

Whether they are right or wrong

Bobble heads who are afraid

To stand up or challenge

Newsflash they are not true friends

Sick of some of these dead beat

Fathers crying about children support

When you didn’t do right on your own

So mothers had to turn

To the government for assistance

It’s your fault that you fathers

Have to pay it

Some of your fathers words

Ain’t worth nothing

Never consistent

No wonder why you have bad credit

Constantly trying to make

A mother feel bad for asking for help

Dude we didn’t make these

Children by ourselves

If you can’t be a good father

Do us all a favor

And get yourself fixed

So over these good for nothing fathers

Who’s always coming up with excuses

Like a student sitting in

The principal’s office

Offering a reason for skipping

How about this don’t just be a father

Be a dad

That’s called being a man

A sign of great parenting

Is not having children

Who becomes estranged from you

The moment they reach 18

All behind past things that happened

In which they are still hurting

Having a blessed relationship

With our children until we are old

Should be every parent’s

Ultimate goal

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What’s Tameeka Listening To?

This is my last What’s Tameeka Listening to post of 2016. I will say this over and over again I love music!!!! When it comes to mainstream music  I enjoy very few songs. My playlist has a lot of old school music in it. I was having a conversation today  and  I was thinking about how  most times my favorite songs by an artist usually isn’t one of their biggest hits. When  I listen to an album I listen to the entire thing not just the big hit. I’ll give an example my two favorite songs by Prince are Money Doesn’t Matter 2 Night and Adore. Most people favorite song by George Micheal is Careless Whisper but my favorite song is Praying for time. Speaking of Prince and George Micheal they will be missed  I can’t believe that they are gone. There were many musicians who passed away this year David Bowie, Phife Dawg, Joey Feek, Maurice White, Natalie Cole, Merle Haggard, Frank Sinatra Jr., Paul Kantner and Glenn Frey to name a few. Life is short get right with Christ, forgive and love.

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Vanity

45th Annual Academy Of Country Music Awards - Concerts On Fremont - Day 2

Joey Feek Country Singer

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Maurice White

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Phife Dawg

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David Bowie

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George Michael

Photo of PRINCE

Prince

These people were some incredibly amazing artist; they will definitely be missed.

Spiritual Maturity

I will not and do not pretend that  I have it all together; however, I will say that I am a woman who has learned from her mistakes. One of the biggest mistakes that  I have done in the past is allowing my emotions to control me. Too many times we live off of our feelings when we live from off of our feelings, we don’t make wise choices. Spiritual maturity is knowing how to manage our emotions and not allowing them to control us. It’s good to have feelings they help us to be able to relate to others we can empathize and have compassion, but we can’t allow our feelings to lead us the wrong way. There can be no spiritual growth as long as we follow our feelings; we have to know what feels wrong but choose to do what is right.

The enemy mission is to kill, steal, and destroy the one thing he wants the most is to kill our faith; he tries to do this during times of trouble. How we respond to the enemy attacks is to not act like him but act like Christ. I speak about marriage a whole lot; it’s a covenant that was created by God; marriage is one of the best examples of commitment. Marriage is a beautiful thing, especially when it has God as the foundation. So many marriages end in divorce because people go into it with unrealistic ideas of what marriage is. A word of advice if you are standing in front of the pastor exchanging vows with the thought of if this doesn’t work then. Do Not Get Married!!! Divorce should not be an option if a marriage encounters problems. Unions have problems sometimes  I don’t care how great it is at times. The vows have for better or worse, let’s focused on both words because they are both critical. When people first get married, everything is new, but after a while, it will wear off commitment is suppose to step in, it takes a marriage to a deeper level which is more substantial.

I want a husband that is committed to me once the excitement and newness wear off. I want a husband who loves Christ more than I do, is loyal, faithful, sincere, a leader, and is more stringent than the toughest times that we encounter. Commitment is strength and not giving up just because things don’t feel right anymore. An excellent marriage strength is in its commitment and not just feelings alone; it’s a sign of real victory!! Remember a marriage will lose its newness like a brand new car but you will still keep the car, right? Total commitment is staying committed to the very end.

I’ve come along way, and  I have been through a lot, but I thank God for all of it. Every day I commit to putting on love, kindness, and patience regardless of the situation or how I feel. People have disappointed me, betrayed me, let me down, and hurt me even after  I have been helpful to them. I feel sorry for people who are always angry; it’s a sign that they are operating off of emotions alone, and that is never good. Regardless of how people treat me, I am still going to do things on purpose like loving those who have hurt me and pray for them. Hurt people hurt others healed people heal others; I am whole!! I am always counting the cost of every move that  I make, and I am walking in love too. Thankful so much for becoming strong spiritually off of the Word of God.

Colossians 3:14

And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.

What’s Tameeka Listening To?

I have a favorite thing that I do on my blog it’s called What’s Tameeka listening to? I share music that people may or may not know. I am a music lover but I am really not a huge fan of the mainstream music especially now a days. The music that I listen to is pretty much everything but they are mostly old schooled. Anyways people are making huge waves about Solange new album it’s like everywhere that I turn people are talking about it. Solange new album is called A Seat at the Table. The first song off of her album is called Don’t touch my hair. The way people are going on about it I even asked some of my family members if they liked the song. There are people who I follow on YouTube that love the album. They say that they exercise to it. I’m like okay. I will be honest I gave it a listen and maybe I’m missing something here. Maybe her music needs to grow on me but 9 times out of 10 I won’t like it in the future neither. I’m not sure what the big deal is. And Yeah I said it I’m not caring that it’s Solange okay!!

What I Have Learned

I decided to start a blog and I have done some audio as well. This is my first time ever doing these things. Just wanted to do something different add some more coolness to my life’s resume while inspiring as many people as I can.With starting anything new you will have people being positive and people being negative. I am not going to say embrace positive words only we have to be open to constructive criticism. The more that we know the more we grow.  Anything different people have to adjust to it but we can’t allow it to let go of what we are passionate about.

We must be selective of how much that we choose to take in. Too much negative words isn’t good either. We may have to resort to treating people who are always negative like static in a radio just straighten the antenna to hear what we need to hear crystal clear.

Blog- a regularly updated website or web page, typically one run by an individual or small group, that is written in an informal or conversational style.

Blogging is something that caught my eye I enjoy writing and sharing my views. How much of anyone’s opinion do I need? I’ll answer the question. It’s none. However  anyone whom I trust truly opinion I value so I will listen. I do want my blog to grow  and it will eventually. What I am going to do is continue what I am doing as well as a whole lot more. I’m proud of my blog and I’m not planning on stopping anytime soon.