Promise Of A New Me

There are so many things that I got from my mother that I am proud of my writing skills, curvy body and unfortunately a struggle with weight. Growing up I was a thin kid but as I got into my teens and older the battle of my weight began. I’m 5’7 so the ideal weight is between 129 pounds to 145 pounds. My weight would yo yo between 190 pounds to 210 pounds but once I had my boys my weight toppled to a whopping 289.  I tried everything that I could all the fad diets I would lose a few pounds and gain it all back and then some. My highest weight was 320 pounds. The emergency room was like my second home having constant headaches and chest pains. Finally on one of my visits to the emergency room a doctor that became acquainted with me sat me down and started to press on my leg he goes “Do you see that?” “That’s fluid it’s around your heart too.” “Stop eating!”

 

I was so fed up with my weight. When there were parent teacher conferences I would always pick times when it was really early or really late I didn’t want to be an embarrassment to my kids let’s face it children can be cruel. The boys had enough on their plates they didn’t need me to be one of them as well. So I just made up my mind that I was going to do something about my weight. I started with Weight Watchers and Slim Fast bars along with walking daily. Before I knew it I was down 60 to 80 pounds so I let go of Weight Watchers and the Slim Fast bars. I watched what I eat and walked. With God behind me to help with my will power I went from 320 pounds to 154 pounds. Everyday is a struggle I love food and I eat when stressed. But I just keep fighting.

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The Chains Must Be Broken

Anyone who knows me personally knows that I don’t have a racist bone in my body and I have no self hate. At times it can be hard being me and being attracted to white men doesn’t help matters either. At times I get a whole lot of flack from my fellow brothers. It needs to be understood I don’t hate them as a matter of fact I love them in a Christian way. There is a chain that needs to be broken and it starts in the homes. When a family is broken it causes lots of damages for some that can’t be fixed. The blame game comes into to play attached with hate. Some of the black young girls become black women who wants love so much that she loses sight of her worth. Black boys grow up into black men who sometimes hate their mothers and they take it out on fellow black women. The chains must be broken it’s time to stop all the hate and turn negative into a positive. I came from a broken home but I allowed that to make me stronger. I don’t have a bad attitude I am simply aware of what I want and I go for it.

I find this video interesting:

Let the Biological Clock Tick

1992 may not mean much for some people, it was the year when a seed got planted into my subconscious. My Cousin Vinny had a part in the movie that stuck out to me. It was the porch scene when Mona Lisa Vito she was talking to Vinny she goes “My biological clock is [taps her foot] ticking like this.” that one little line would get me into trouble nine years later. In my twenties I was in a rush to do everything and placed a time on when important events were to happen. I have since learned that anything that requires a long term commitment allow the biological clock to tick. The last thing that should be done is forcing something that should not be. In my opinion the saying “You make your bed hard now you have to lay it” should not be forever for anyone.

We should not act like an ambitious entrepreneur or a pushy car salesman when it comes to pursuing relationships or having children. These situations effects more than just one person. I know  that people always say that we must be careful who we have children with because we are stuck with the person for 18 years. I disagree having a child with a person is a lifetime commitment just because a child becomes 18 doesn’t mean that they will no longer need you. When the children graduate from college, get married or have their very own kids guess who else will be there besides you? I’m not being negative just realistic. As a matter of fact we should base these kinds of decisions on how our partner would treat us in case things don’t work out. A person who truly loves a person would not want to see the person hurt even if they are angry with them.

Real love is true love that at times have it’s ups and downs which should not be confused with red flags. Ups and downs in a relationship is when the love has been tested and proven that it’s meant. Therefore a relationship  that is meant one puts in the work to keep it. Red flags are signs that have been popping up from the very beginning but they were ignored. Most times when a relationship is not meant family and trusted  friends can see that it’s not. People on the outside tend to be able to see things better  than those that are on the inside. It’s important to be wise about these things. Also sometimes loneliness and low self esteem can a play role how things get viewed. It’s all about realizing that we are worthy of the best. Single people should look at happy couples as an inspiration of what destiny has to bring but it won’t happen by rushing it. I truly believe that every person that comes into our lives are for a reason. Still some are for a season and some are permanent it’s all about knowing that difference. That is why I have learned to ignore the biological clock it can tick away I trust God and I know that everything will be okay.

 

Sister Power

Having a sister

Is like having

A special bond

Like no other

Sister Sledge

Made their pledge

To being a family

Of amazing sisters

It’s a part I love

To take happily

I love my sisters

That’s right all three

Sometimes we may

Not always agree

Still they are mine

And that makes me happy

It’s a big deal

For that I am delighted

I love seeing sisters united

Like the Pointer Sisters

I’m so excited

I’m not saying  that

Having a brother is

A bad thing

I’m just saying

That sister power

Is like no other

It’s one of life’s

Greatest rewards

Like a sweet melody

By Mary Mary

The Clark Sisters

Have been showing

Their sister power

For years

Sisters bonds are dear

It’s so clear

There’s nothing like

Sister Power

 

 

Love Sick

Like having pneumonia or the flu

I’m love sick for you

A stuffy head

That’s filled with all kinds of thoughts

A dry cough that

Leaves my throat tickly

My stomach swarms with butterflies

Sneezes that are accompanied with blessings

Wheezing that leaves me breathless

Your love has me feeling helpless

A chest that holds a warm heart

I’m overflowing with so much love

You give me fever

My body is burning

My soul’s on fire

Your love takes me higher

It’s only you whom I desire

Yearning constantly

All these feelings are ones

That I have never known

A new chapter in my life has been born

Your love is in a class of it’s own

Even though these feelings make me

Feel so uncomfortable and vulnerable

They are still very much welcomed

And they help me to feel alive

My senses are tingling

What a sensation

All of my symptoms

Thankful for love

What a wonderful creation

I want it to stick

Don’t want no cure for it

Cause I am love sick

And I love it

 

 

 

 

 

Dallas Cowboys Fan

Let me start off by saying

That you don’t have to be a man

To appreciate the wonderful sport of football

Preseason, Postseason, Playoffs, Pro Bowl and Super Bowl

It doesn’t matter the season or reason I lose control

My team are the boys

In  the silver, white and blue

Win or Lose

I stay faithful

I stay loyal

I stay forever true

Counting on number 9

To coincide with the offensive line

I am a strong believer

In our Wide receivers

Linebackers, Cornerbacks, and Safety

Protect the goal line

Don’t let the opposing team score

Not even a field goal

Come on defense

Put up that Iron Curtain

Come September

I will be yelling at the T.V screen

Doing my football dance

Calling out the referees

On their bad calls

I love football

I will represent

To the fullest

And I am so excited

Watching my team play

It gives my heart great joy

How Bout Them Dallas Cowboys