He’s My Baby Daddy

I wanted to hurry up and post this before father’s day because I don’t want to ruin the day with this news. Unless you have been living under a rock, then you may have heard about the baby daddy greeting card Target drama. Yes, I call it drama because the situation is totally unnecessary. I don’t understand some of the people of my race. How come it’s okay for some of us to come up with words or be able to say certain words to one another but the minute a white person says it they are racist? Yeah, I said it. For instance, the “n” word is a very offensive word, but some black people call one another that. Now stay with me. I’m about to make a huge point.

I recently took a class, and the subject came up about what is acceptable language socially. Long story short it was agreed upon that if it’s not acceptable socially, then it should not be expressed verbally publicly. Still, what is offensive? I have never liked the phrase “baby daddy.” I would cringe when I would hear some females say, “oh, he’s just my baby, daddy.” There is nothing cool about having a baby daddy or for some mothers, baby daddies. This phrase was supposed to be the new in words like “fleek” a word that I wish would go far away!!!
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Some classes were being taught in school about Ebonics. It was shown so that other races of people could understand the blending of words ebony, aka black and phonics sounds. The Britannica describes it as “a form of American English used in the home or for day-to-day communication rather than for formal occasions.” The Merriam-Webster refers to “baby daddy” as slang.

The Urban Dictionary defines “baby daddy” as a father of a woman’s child that she is not involved with” The sentence used to explain the meaning of the words went something like this “Who is that? “Girl two.” That’s my dumb baby daddy”. So if this word is in the urban dictionary and it’s being used in heavy rotation, what’s the big deal about the “baby daddy” greeting card?

Target is a retail department store that was trying to “target” or appeal to the people who uses this phrase. I feel that it’s beyond ridiculous that they had to apologize for a greeting card. The greeting card was sighted as being “racially insensitive.” How is a greeting card with “baby daddy” in it being racially insensitive? It was a phrase invented by a person or people of the black race. For goodness, sakes. How is a “baby daddy” card racist? I wonder what the race of the person who made the card was? And what kind of father’s day cards would mothers who aren’t involved with their children’s fathers deem to be appropriate? I guarantee that many of them refer to their children’s fathers as their “baby daddy.” Frankly, I just don’t get it. Here’s what was inside of the greeting card:
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I could be wrong, but I think that when something sheds light on the bad things that are usually celebrated within the black community that should not be. The reality of dysfunction becomes real then all of a sudden it comes off as being “racist” because the dysfunction of what is going on in the black community is being exposed even if it’s done unintentionally. Getting all up in an uproar behind a greeting card shows that the truth hurts.

Writing What Matters to Me

I once heard a person say that “a writer writes something every day”. Hmmmm, I am not so sure about that. It’s quality over quantity always. When I first started my blogging journey I wrote like I was writing in a diary really, really relaxed. The subjects that I shared were always interesting but I had to become more aware of my grammar. Overall, I am proud of my blog. I wanted to do something that had lots of interesting things. Having mind blowing posts that sticks leaving a lasting impression. That’s what I am aiming for. I believe also that I should do things that makes me feel that I am being true to myself. If not, why should I blog at all?

Growing up I always loved writing especially poems. I have been writing poems every since I was a teenager. Blogging allows me to dive into others things that are important to me as well. As I have said there is only but so much that I can say on Facebook without someone not feeling what I am saying.

I will do whatever it takes to keep my blog going. Since I am so passionate about what I write I refuse to fold when it comes to my blog. The things that I talk about needs to be said I am not about saying things so that it goes over people’s heads. Nope, nope, and nope.

Happy Birthday Dad

There is so much to love about February like it being a month away from spring, the month of one of my favorite president’s birthday, black history month and (drum roll please) my step-dad’s birthday. My step-dad is one of the greatest people that  I know.

I love my step-dad I really do. There are so many reasons why  I appreciate him. My step-dad has been in my life every since  I was about ten years old. He always helped my mom to  make things happen. My mother and step-dad had no children together but he treated us like his own. When my mother became sick he never left her side.

In 1997 my mother passed away from cancer. The funeral that my mother had was loaded with people who told my sisters and  I that they had our backs. As time went on the people at the funeral faded away but step-dad stayed. My step-dad never went anywhere he’s always been there for my sisters and I.

My step-dad still talks a lot about my mother even though she has been gone twenty years. I love one of  the stories that  he tells me one year my sisters and  I wanted bikes. He told my mom maybe they should get two bikes but my mother told him if all of us can’t get a bike then no one can. When my sisters and I woke up on Christmas day there were four bikes by the tree one for each of us.

I value my step-dad very much and pray that God blesses him with many more birthdays. In today’s society it’s a treasure to find a person who values you and your children without motives. My step-dad is a really great dad and  I am so glad that  I am blessed to have him in my life.

We Are Not Same

Everyone is distinctive

In his or her own way

We are not the same

This is something that should be taught

To every child on their first school day

Each one of us

Have our own fingerprints and DNA

Black people come in different shades

White people have different

Hair and eye color

Asian people have Chinese, Japanese

Filipino, Pakistani, and Korean

Can you see where I am going with this

These things helps us to stand up

And stand out

From one another

We are not the same

Every woman can wear a size 8

And will still be different shapes

Some people are tall

Some people are short

Take the time to embrace

What makes people different

Do it as a way to appreciate it

And not as a way to copy it

To copy is to compete

You will forget why you are unique

You never want to lose yourself

Because you may never

Find yourself ever again

Being a person who follow trends

Regardless of a person

Trying to be the same

Least common factors

Will always remain

Apply this analogy to snowflakes

In your mind allow it to resonate

When we realize that being different

Is actually us being ourselves

It’s a blessing like nothing else

Differences help to make

This world beautiful

If everything were the same

We would not have things like the

Rainbow it requires

Various colors to make it complete

Even roses come in different colors

One life touches another

Different life stories with many pages

That are to encourage and inspire

It’s how God gets His glory

We must be the person

Who God called us to be

We are not the same

That will never change

And you know what

It’s okay

Why Wait?

Happy New Year!! Blessings to All!!

Yaaaaaaay!! It’s 2017 so now what? I know that some people somewhere have made New Year resolutions but why wait on a new year to make goals? Everyday that we are blessed to see is a blessing. We have to take the limits off of God so that we can have what He has for us. Many times the things that God sends our way we never see coming however we can be ready for when He does.

One thing that  I saw in the news that is making waves Serena’s engagement. Why is there so much hate? She has the right to be happy. The one thing that should be a requirement daily is the company that we keep. Everyone that we have on a team should celebrate us and God is number one. While  I am on the subject about love a man knows his intentions when he comes in contact with a woman. A man knows if he wants to marry a woman or not it doesn’t take him years to figure it out. I’m not judging however if a woman wants marriage and if he doesn’t pop the question in a year he probably won’t. Men don’t always communicate how they feel but they will show you. Actions  speak louder than words. When a person shows you something don’t be blind to it just because it’s something that  you don’t want to see. No matter how much it may hurt let it go because nothing hurts more than prolonged hurt. Let go of everything that hurts and Let God!!!

Life is short and it’s ours; we deserve the best don’t settle for less. Compromising should only happen once one is married not while you are searching for a lifetime partner it’s a huge decision. I pray that everyone receive the desires of their hearts, that they pay attention to what God is telling them and showing them as well as much much more! Remember with God on our team we don’t have any need to worry but we must be in tune with His voice it’s vital when it comes to life choices.  Make the choice to have God in your life daily not as a new year resolution, not just during bad times but allllll of the time.

Psalm 37:4  Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

What’s Tameeka Listening To?

This is my last What’s Tameeka Listening to post of 2016. I will say this over and over again I love music!!!! When it comes to mainstream music  I enjoy very few songs. My playlist has a lot of old school music in it. I was having a conversation today  and  I was thinking about how  most times my favorite songs by an artist usually isn’t one of their biggest hits. When  I listen to an album I listen to the entire thing not just the big hit. I’ll give an example my two favorite songs by Prince are Money Doesn’t Matter 2 Night and Adore. Most people favorite song by George Micheal is Careless Whisper but my favorite song is Praying for time. Speaking of Prince and George Micheal they will be missed  I can’t believe that they are gone. There were many musicians who passed away this year David Bowie, Phife Dawg, Joey Feek, Maurice White, Natalie Cole, Merle Haggard, Frank Sinatra Jr., Paul Kantner and Glenn Frey to name a few. Life is short get right with Christ, forgive and love.

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Vanity

45th Annual Academy Of Country Music Awards - Concerts On Fremont - Day 2

Joey Feek Country Singer

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Maurice White

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Phife Dawg

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David Bowie

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George Michael

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Prince

These people were some incredibly amazing artist; they will definitely be missed.

Spiritual Maturity

I will not and do not pretend that  I have it all together; however, I will say that I am a woman who has learned from her mistakes. One of the biggest mistakes that  I have done in the past is allowing my emotions to control me. Too many times we live off of our feelings when we live from off of our feelings, we don’t make wise choices. Spiritual maturity is knowing how to manage our emotions and not allowing them to control us. It’s good to have feelings they help us to be able to relate to others we can empathize and have compassion, but we can’t allow our feelings to lead us the wrong way. There can be no spiritual growth as long as we follow our feelings; we have to know what feels wrong but choose to do what is right.

The enemy mission is to kill, steal, and destroy the one thing he wants the most is to kill our faith; he tries to do this during times of trouble. How we respond to the enemy attacks is to not act like him but act like Christ. I speak about marriage a whole lot; it’s a covenant that was created by God; marriage is one of the best examples of commitment. Marriage is a beautiful thing, especially when it has God as the foundation. So many marriages end in divorce because people go into it with unrealistic ideas of what marriage is. A word of advice if you are standing in front of the pastor exchanging vows with the thought of if this doesn’t work then. Do Not Get Married!!! Divorce should not be an option if a marriage encounters problems. Unions have problems sometimes  I don’t care how great it is at times. The vows have for better or worse, let’s focused on both words because they are both critical. When people first get married, everything is new, but after a while, it will wear off commitment is suppose to step in, it takes a marriage to a deeper level which is more substantial.

I want a husband that is committed to me once the excitement and newness wear off. I want a husband who loves Christ more than I do, is loyal, faithful, sincere, a leader, and is more stringent than the toughest times that we encounter. Commitment is strength and not giving up just because things don’t feel right anymore. An excellent marriage strength is in its commitment and not just feelings alone; it’s a sign of real victory!! Remember a marriage will lose its newness like a brand new car but you will still keep the car, right? Total commitment is staying committed to the very end.

I’ve come along way, and  I have been through a lot, but I thank God for all of it. Every day I commit to putting on love, kindness, and patience regardless of the situation or how I feel. People have disappointed me, betrayed me, let me down, and hurt me even after  I have been helpful to them. I feel sorry for people who are always angry; it’s a sign that they are operating off of emotions alone, and that is never good. Regardless of how people treat me, I am still going to do things on purpose like loving those who have hurt me and pray for them. Hurt people hurt others healed people heal others; I am whole!! I am always counting the cost of every move that  I make, and I am walking in love too. Thankful so much for becoming strong spiritually off of the Word of God.

Colossians 3:14

And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.

Cuffing Season

I’m a very positive person still you have to speak truth. Sometimes when you speak truth some people don’t want to receive it that’s fine come back to my blog when you are ready to. I write about things that are thought about and on this post I want to discuss cuffing season.

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Now I know what you are thinking what is Tameeka talking about now??!!! Well I’ll tell you cuffing season is when people try to cuff others and it’s Not out of love so don’t confuse the two. If a person hasn’t contacted you springtime nor summer but want to now you should wondering why. Sometimes when others are treating us wrong we think that it’s a reflection of ourselves but it isn’t it’s quite the opposite. We still have to be honest to keep us from enduring unnecessary pain. Just because a person is with you physically doesn’t mean that they are mentally remember home is where the heart is. Who needs a dude texting another woman while you are sleeping and some woman may want to fool herself if a man is doing sneaky things like that it’s not love believe me when I tell you.

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I understand that sometimes we get lonely it’s human but we don’t want to allow a season to mess us up for a lifetime. God will send the right one but it can’t happen if you are with the wrong one. Any person cuffing you during cuffing season is the wrong one. Trust God. In our times of weakness it’s best to pray.

What’s Tameeka Listening To?

I have a favorite thing that I do on my blog it’s called What’s Tameeka listening to? I share music that people may or may not know. I am a music lover but I am really not a huge fan of the mainstream music especially now a days. The music that I listen to is pretty much everything but they are mostly old schooled. Anyways people are making huge waves about Solange new album it’s like everywhere that I turn people are talking about it. Solange new album is called A Seat at the Table. The first song off of her album is called Don’t touch my hair. The way people are going on about it I even asked some of my family members if they liked the song. There are people who I follow on YouTube that love the album. They say that they exercise to it. I’m like okay. I will be honest I gave it a listen and maybe I’m missing something here. Maybe her music needs to grow on me but 9 times out of 10 I won’t like it in the future neither. I’m not sure what the big deal is. And Yeah I said it I’m not caring that it’s Solange okay!!